Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML
Today, I went on a date, and halfway through I started getting nonstop calls from “Mom” on my phone. Annoyed, I silenced them. Later, I checked my voicemail. It was actually my mom calling from the ER because she had slipped and broken her ankle. FML
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
Today, I went on a movie date with a guy. He brought his mom. FML
Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. We hit it off, and he invited me back to his place. As soon as we got there, his mother came out of nowhere and started interrogating me about "my intentions." FML
Today, a woman turned up uninvited at my house, ready for our first date. After some embarrassed investigating, it turns out my mother signed me up to Tinder and arranged a date, all without telling me, because she refuses to believe I prefer solitude over dating. FML
Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML
Today, I had a first date with a guy I met online. And his mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to take me out bowling. My mom was going to take us. My parents ended up bowling with us. I had a double date with my parents. FML
Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
regalarius 0
Oops! Well you had to come out eventually, but FYL :- Also: not last! :-) (I'll be teed off if they close the topic though)
thefaded 0
Your parents must not have been too upset - at least they didn't barge over to your table and demand to know what was up.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (393)
aiezaiza 0
I love the fact that someone wrote about the "stigmata" attached to homosexuality. Stigmata is a religious miracle where somebody gets the signs of the crucifixion appearing on their hands. LOL :)
GrapefruitZoe 0
That's a crazy phenomenom. It's totally in the person's head. They create them, because the scars almost always appear on the hands, whereas crucifixions would require nails through the wrists. OH THE HOLOGRAPHIC UNIVERSE!!!!!!!! IT IS SO. ACCEPT IT NOW!
lakester 0
to all previous moronic comments: SO WHAT if a total stranger is gay. it happens. they exist, and always have existed. it does not concern you or affect in absolutely any way. and it's not like they're going to cease to exist if you treat them badly enough.
anonymousabcd 0
Hahahaha I agree. Which is why i don't give a shit. I don't have anything bad to say or have anything against gays, but i don't support them. Sorry if i offended anyone. :P
null_fml 11
So you're.. basically neutral towards gays? Now that's an attitude I can appreciate!
RatIsKing 0
STALKERS!!!!!
NEWTROLLINTOWN 0
god made Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve
Jazzywrites007 2
No, you genius! God made Adam and Steve....while Eve *watched*. But Steve kept re-decorating the Garden so they killed him and buried him under the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil! That whole "apple" thing is just a misprint. Geez, did you even READ the bible???? ;-)
catriona_cd 0
so you are another one that agrees that incest is ok?? geneticaly adam and eve are related :P since "god" made eve from a rib taken from adam, that is genetic engineering isnt it? we dont have to accept people we only have to tollerate them:)
PlasmaFox 0
YDI for pretending that people are accepting of homosexuality. They aren't. Stop whining and get over it.
rockmyworld 0
holy smokes, this is about twenty different conversations on one page.. well, that does kind of suck..at least they didn't exactly embarass you and your date. gd luck! hope all goes well
BloodyPoisonKiss 0
Awwww, well I hope things went well. And tell all of those other homophobes to go to hell!! People do accept homosexuals!! I may be straight, but I am a full fledged supporter!
feminist19 0
so your bent?
melange_fml 0
Why is everyone going insane and attacking the OP's homosexuality? This isn't really the place, you troll nutjobs!
eschroeck89 0
YDI for being a fag!!!