Kids and Awkward: Today, while walking in the city with my little sister, she let...

By Sharee K. - 08/08/2011 19:20 - United States

Today, while walking in the city with my little sister, she let go of my hand. Not wanting to lose her, I quickly tried to grab it back. That resulted in me grabbing some 50 year-old man's junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 526

You deserved it 6 583

Fête de la Musique: Notes et Négligences
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Same thing different taste

By anon - 05/04/2017 04:00

Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 682

You deserved it 741

By Anonymous - 30/08/2011 04:46 - United States

Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 002

You deserved it 3 883

By tigerbyrn - 30/05/2016 15:35 - Canada - Scarborough

Today, as I was about to meet my girlfriend's parents, she thought it would be funny to grab my junk and give me a hard-on right before they walked in. I couldn't hide it quickly enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 054

You deserved it 2 085

By SpongeAbii2 - 24/01/2012 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 759

You deserved it 2 961

Knight

By Racked - 01/03/2016 18:00 - United States - Corpus Christi

Today, I walked my girlfriend home. As I kissed her goodbye, I heard a high-pitched scream and turned just in time to see her little brother charge head-first into my nuts. All because I kissed her on the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 218

You deserved it 1 920

By grabber - 09/08/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 345

You deserved it 10 998

By cachucy - 18/03/2012 15:04 - United States - Geneva

Today, I was walking to a café with my soon-to-be boss. While crossing a busy street, I slipped in a puddle and accidentally grabbed his junk to catch myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 716

You deserved it 3 517

By TronCat8230 - 20/05/2017 12:00

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 066

You deserved it 2 152

Public freakout time

By camzzz - 02/07/2011 08:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were walking around when she got lost in a crowd. And me, being a pig, playfully grabbed her butt. I realized it wasn't hers when the guy whose butt I'd grabbed by accident knocked me unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 196

You deserved it 47 777

Pure class

By DanceOnTheEdge - 20/07/2009 01:23 - United States

Today, I was riding in the car with my boyfriend. While he was driving, I held out my hand as an offer for him to hold it. Instead, he grabs me by the wrist and shoves my hand down his pants. Lovely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 688

You deserved it 19 383

ZoZo17_fml 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 0:49

Awkward. Was he smiling.?

IndyJustin 4

Tuesday 9 August 2011 0:50

was he hard?

Comments

NashyzzleTheN 10

Tuesday 9 August 2011 5:41

What if he was your grandpa? That would be an "ohh shit" moment right there!

ktateprado 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 5:46

Okay. Tomorrow I will get it on inside a portapotty inside a dumpster.

SoccerRebel594 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 5:51

only if you are standing in the poop hole of the porta-potty.

ktateprado 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 5:52

Can do.

eggball 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 5:53

How did you mistake some guys genitals for a hand?

sweetheartxoxo88 7

Tuesday 9 August 2011 6:06

Don't sweat it! You probably made the guys day.

sexxme 9

Tuesday 9 August 2011 6:09

haha you got him all hard and just walked away...or did you?

lolx7 5

Tuesday 9 August 2011 6:16

lol

kitkrest 8

Tuesday 9 August 2011 6:24

Sexy ;)

danielxp 0

Tuesday 9 August 2011 6:31

Ewww, that's got to be a start to a pretty bad day. Lmfao.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Roommate Music Singing TV shows Animals Dogs Relatable Sports Weird Love Cheating AITA Death Awkward Annoying Family Health Doctor Capitalism Money Work Drunk Concert Friends Coworkers Pranks Sextoys Intimacy

The Top

Today, a man with one eye and a severely disfigured face accosted me at the grocery store. What started as a question about my shirt became an explanation for why he looks the way he does: He took a shotgun blast to the face. I didn't ask about or even draw attention to his appearance. Sweet dreams for me tonight! FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 77

Today, my friend, who I'm moving in with, flew up to drive from Pennsylvania to Texas, where she lives, with me. I went to the airport to pick her up and we discovered she accidentally flew to the wrong airport. On the other side of the state. I'm driving through the night to rescue her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 131

You deserved it 1 350

The Top

Today, I'm incredibly depressed because of touch-starvation. I also have haphephobia, the fear of being touched, in addition to crippling social anxiety. Why do I feel as though I was intentionally made to be as utterly miserable as possible? FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 259

Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 358

You deserved it 3 799

Today, I had mice in the house and had to kill them with mousetraps. I pulled a trap out with a dead mouse and my four year-old son saw. Mice are his favorite animals, and now he won’t speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 214

Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 962

You deserved it 7 281

Today, I'm gonna have to make the very difficult decision to ask my roommate to get rid of his dogs. They're not only the most disobedient little shits I've ever known, but they're also terrifying my cats. My oldest cat, who has always been pretty chill, quiet, and independent, is now vocal, clingy and nervous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 799

You deserved it 276

Today, I got a job with a filmmaking company, turned up on my first day, and now I know why I'd never heard of the company before. Porn. They were making porn, all kinds of disgusting porn. I quit so fast I was barely even there. This was the only job offer I’ve had since graduation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 9 079

Same thing different taste

Knight

Public freakout time

Pure class

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