Old guy from family guy "It must be my birthday"

So his dick was just hanging? Just like that? You Americans are really strange...

We need more people like you to populate this earth... not because I'm perverted or anything.

I'm sure he smiled after

11, What the heck does your's do?

If he did smile that would be your Q to run.

I just hate it when that happens.

If you're going to grab it you're going to finish it.

I meant hanging *out* of your pants... while you're out..

30 - I don't think the bloke was walking down the street naked.

You sure made his day...

What did your sister say?

Nice way to meet

Inappropriate behavior

Not for the old guy! Im sure he was perfectly fine with it.

Haha agreed

Never really had luck, couldn't never figure out,, how do love

you touch it, you eat it. same rule applies here, sweetie.

He must've been soooo happy *quiver*

Excuses, excuses...

Today, I was just casually strolling down the street, enjoying the fresh air when out of nowhere this younger woman leans over and gets a nice handful of my junk. It startled the shot out of me. FM...ah who am I kidding? IFLML (I ******* love my life)

Did he punch you?

38, they call that a glory hole

^ and how do you know that? (Rhetorical question)

No, they call that a glorious hold.

148: op said she tried to grab it quick so therefore it probably hurt like hell

Doubtful, since he was wearing pants. I believe khakis would provide the best hand-to-junk reaction results. And who knows, he may like it a little rough, and a good hard squeez was just the quickie he needed.

They call it I premature I just call it ecstasy.

#172 You wear a rubber at all times, it's a necessity :)

I'm going to assume that OP engaged in sexual relations with said man following this encounter in order to discern his exact age.

Cause 127 jizzed in his pants

you sir/madam/everything else/(except Obama) are a win. just everything about that comment and you is a win.

90-For some reason I can never remember his name

196 is just mad that Obama isn't a ginger and has a soul.

Lol at least he got a little hand-job in the process.

"It was soft at first, but now... now it's hard."

Io don't know what would be worse if OP was a guy or girl

lol #23 That's happened to you more than once?

He tucks it between his legs!! Lmfao

11- tucks it between his legs lmfao!

Did you lose your sister?

I'm sure he got hard after that

Just like you got wet after reading this.

Your picture matches your comment.

hell yeah I did bitch

really just like that huh

His first one in years..

Whoa, wait a sec, 56! He's in his 50s, not 80s!

First one in hours? :o

Im hard.

Me 4

Feelski of some saggy balls

He must've liked it if he kept her around long enough to tell her his age.

This is off topic, but this is my first FML comment.

op ,"sis your hands are so soft and squishy.. (looks) AH" old man," oh yea"

? She didn't want to "lose" her because she let go of her hand.

? She didn't want to "lose" her because she let go of her hand.

Loose- Not fitting firmly. "Not wanting to loose her, I grabbed back." Makes no sense, but I get what you're trying to say.

OP said it right. - I don't want to lose my sister! - oh the darn thing came loose.

It said "loose" at first

hahaha nice =p

You're luckier than the guy who got the keys for gum deal!

your insinct guided you to the good things ;)

^ so why hasn't it guided her to me yet???

op: Amy -_____- get bac- FUUUUUUUU le old man: Problem?

Haha:p good one!

kinky :D

I wasn't meant to be replying to this comment... Thank the mods for this grave mistake.

So did I. No ****.

This is what happens when crack cocaine is cheap >_>

Letting a loved one go is the first step to... Having sex without anyone else knowing You just showed her that.

(sigh)ok. read the post again.

Oops... Well I'm stupid -_-

lmfao, that, was funny!!!

3rd grade reading level FTW? Or is this more of a uncomprehension FTW?

It's because she saw something she liked and she must touch whatever she likes.

hope it wasnt your junk....

10-your photo is soo hot. Hmu? ;)

i hav to agree with you 116 ;)

I think it's to hot for FML

I'd rather not say anything about 10's picture for fear of comment modding...

No it doesn't. You got 18 dislikes. You're obviously lying.

Says the cat in the shady shades >.>

^ dog* bitch.

Damnit, you've got me there Mr. Shady Dog

Haha 174, i like how you said bitch, is that dog a male dog or a female dog (bitch) heheh corny puns

Heres a hint. I'm not a bitch. Bitch.