By spiderwoman - 04/11/2012 17:12 - Iceland - Reykjav

Today, while walking home, I really had to pee, so I decided to do my business in some high grass just off the street. When I got home, I felt an itch between my butt cheeks. I went to the bathroom to check it out, and a dead, apparently crushed spider fell out of my underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 683
You deserved it 13 543

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Top comments

No f the spiders life for being an asswipe! Haha....no.......ok...

I hope it didn't bite you in any intimate areas! D: I've gotten ant bites in bad places from sitting on the sidewalk near grass one time. You can't scratch that anywhere!

Comments

No f the spiders life for being an asswipe! Haha....no.......ok...

No it's ok! That wasn't bad!

Haha.....yes.....okay. Just kidding. No.

and here we can see a common species of a "Thumbs Up Whore" where the creature ends their comment with phrases such as "Haha... No... Okay I'll go now..." in an attempt to get good ratings[/s]

61 I read that in David Attenboroughs voice. Bravo.

The firetruck is a solitary killer. The ambulances will have to wait their turn.

You shouldn't go into the tall grass alone, wild Pokemon can jump out at you

61- I wasn't trying to be a "thumbs up whore" I didn't think it was that funny and didn't want to offend anybody.

You're either having an orgasm or just wanted to be the first one to comment

Wait, who says, "Oh, dear God!" when they orgasm?

22- a firstgasm, you mean?

21- someone who's been reading too much 50 shades of grey

For a second there I thought 43's comment said "FISTgasm." Yikes.

56 - Thanks for making me clench involuntarily. :/

Perhaps clenching was exactly what OP did....

Is that some sort of weird fetish?

Girl: Hey hunny, I'm kinda bored with our sex life. What do you say we spice it up a bit? Guy: *excited* Okay!! What are ya thinkin?!? Girl: Well, Im thinking you strip me naked, tie me face down on the bed... Guy: Yeah!?!?!!!??? Girl: Then shove a spider up my butt Guy: .....wtf....

Yep. Nothing turns me on more than an insect up my arse!

Arachnid*, spiders are not insects.

Is a llamafish an insect?

Is mayonnaise an instrument?

No, Jake. Mayonnaise is not a instrument. Neither is a MacBook. *glares at Skrillex*

Silly Skrillex

This isn't a fetish. How would you even think that?

sarcasm, it must be a new concept to you...

No Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument!

That was some bad sarcasm.

I hope it didn't bite you in any intimate areas! D: I've gotten ant bites in bad places from sitting on the sidewalk near grass one time. You can't scratch that anywhere!

At least it wasn't an asscricket, eh?

*chirp chirp* Sorry to crush your hopes.

It's what he would have wanted.

Yes yes it was...

Don't go into the long grass!!!!!!

Clever girl...

The wild spider used pants attack! It was super effective! OP fainted!

Should've brought her pokemon.

Jurassic Park? Nice.

I think the spider had it worse than you did, OP

Squished to death by ass cheeks... Yeah FHL

I hope it was not a black widow or something.

If it was, she just reunited in spidey heaven with her departed. Rest in peace good buddy, rest in peace.

And this is why I don't do my business outside.

But... Of course you do... Your a cat... Unless your a house cat! ... Which most are.. Okay. I'm stupid. Bye.

Your best comeback is correcting me... :0 hahah