Miscellaneous: Stained

Stained

By maddie94 - 27/04/2009 09:14 - Australia

Today, I was in a shopping center when I went to the toilet. I came out, washed my hands and suddenly got a massive itch in my crotch. Without thinking I itched it. I then had to walk around the center with a wet hand print on my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 405

You deserved it 54 566

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Same thing different taste

By IsThisRealLife - 01/02/2016 17:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up with an extremely irritable rash around my crotch. I didn't want to full out itch it by putting my hands down my pants, so I itched it by putting my hand in my pockets. I got kicked off the train for "pleasuring myself in public." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 912

You deserved it 5 805

What even is that?

By git recked lul - 01/12/2023 06:00 - United States - Allen Park

Today, I felt an itch on my butt so I went to the bathroom to scratch it. It was actually a dried layer of skin that broke from years of wear and tear, and now every time I shit I feel immense pain for the next hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 376

You deserved it 163

By Lydlsis - 30/10/2015 23:53 - United States

Today, while shopping, I suddenly got the terrible urge to use the bathroom. I already had several items and my 5-year-old niece in tow, so I hurried to checkout. I ended up pissing myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 752

You deserved it 4 623

Pissed

By Matt - 13/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 183

You deserved it 530

By Employee - 07/08/2012 19:17 - United States - Lincoln

Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 434

You deserved it 12 611

By spiderwoman - 04/11/2012 17:12 - Iceland - Reykjav

Today, while walking home, I really had to pee, so I decided to do my business in some high grass just off the street. When I got home, I felt an itch between my butt cheeks. I went to the bathroom to check it out, and a dead, apparently crushed spider fell out of my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 726

You deserved it 13 576

When you gotta go, you gotta go

By Amanda Howard - 15/03/2020 09:00

Today, I came home after being stuck in traffic needing to pee really badly. When I went to the bathroom, my boyfriend was on the toilet. I couldn't hold it longer, so I went into the woods behind our house and found a bush. Relieving myself, my butt started to itch. I was sitting in poison ivy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 570

You deserved it 522

By XavierLing - 23/07/2019 06:00

Today, my thigh was itchy, so I went into a bathroom stall to scratch it. I, for some reason, moaned out loud while doing it. After that, the men's bathroom went completely silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 095

You deserved it 780

Leaked

By Morgan Bailey - 18/09/2018 14:00

Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 746

You deserved it 893

By FutureMarine3658 - 08/08/2012 14:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 438

You deserved it 50 525

mrhahn530 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:14

You SCRATCHED it...what the hell is with people and thinking "itch" is a verb?

housemd1120 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:12

Hahahahahahaha that had to be a funny sight that sucks. Maybe you should think before you scratch

Comments

housemd1120 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:12

Hahahahahahaha that had to be a funny sight that sucks. Maybe you should think before you scratch

mrhahn530 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:14

You SCRATCHED it...what the hell is with people and thinking "itch" is a verb?

w12345 2

Sunday 16 May 2010 4:24

that is why they created the hand dryer...

purple_gurl 1

Tuesday 6 July 2010 5:47

#2 ugh I know I hate it when my friends say that.

MaeeFlowers 0

Saturday 21 August 2010 11:04

Haha, look on the brightside. I'm sure you brightened someones day:)

julianak 0

Tuesday 16 November 2010 11:18

I thought I was the only one!! my friends say " itched" all the time an it annoys the loving crap out of me

dearViena 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:14

it happenes allllll the time

Usernameis2lon 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:15

lol

silly_face 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:15

Hmmm... maybe you should have used the hand dryers to dry it instead of walking around with a hand print on your crotch??

z0mbie_9ine 0

Monday 24 August 2009 22:46

That's what I was thinking, lol. Imagine walking into the bathroom and seeing someone with their hips thrust out and drying their crotch under the hand dryer.. lmfao; cam-phones out!!

fatality2009 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:18

Well you should've think before doing things with your dick or youre gonna end up like mychael jackson P.S. does this makes sence? im just being random haha

woopwoopwoop 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 14:16

I'd be a bit more worried that she HAS a dick than that she was doing things with it, if that were the case :D

fatfaceunited 0

Monday 27 April 2009 21:19

#2 itch is a verb you dumbass. I itch, you itch, he/she/it itches. learn your parts of speech you ******* moron. http://dictionary.reference.com/dic?q=itch&search=search

brandnewkey 14

Monday 30 November 2009 18:34

The OP was using it informally...it's not the correct way to use the word.

jdavis24 2

Tuesday 14 February 2012 23:33

Haha love it!

EverdreamOfMe 24

Tuesday 5 March 2013 22:15

No need to be so hateful.

bunnygirl 2

Monday 27 April 2009 21:20

#7 the proper word is actually SCRATCHES. you lose. 'itch' is an informal way of saying it which is actually not proper

MissMae93 23

Tuesday 4 October 2011 6:27

"without thinking I SCRATCHES it." Hmmm, no. That makes no sense what-so-ever. "Scratched" would be the word to use in this instance so actually, you lose.