Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, a pervert was visibly playing with himself right next to me on the train. Then on the bus. Then on the other bus I changed to in order to lose him. At least somebody's interested. FML
Today, on the bus, a man in his late 30s sat next to me. After a moment, he turned to me and said with a wink, "You must be ovulating, I can smell your vagina." FML
Today, I was talking to an old man I met at a store. He just wanted to know a few things, and he asked about my day. I explained a few bad things that'd happened, then I thanked him for listening. He then asked, "So, how are we gonna do this?" He thought we were gonna fuck. FML
Today, I had to sit through 10 minutes of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML
Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with, "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML
Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML
Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML
Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML
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Top comments
aardvarkish 17
I'm all ears
KaylynKicks 0
oooooo sexy! what a turn on
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Comments (174)
MissAndreaSummer 0
haha wow what a creep. sorry to hear that!
Colts1018 0
oh I just found out how to comment, cool
nommnom_fml 0
veryy nice. HIGH FIVE
Pearljammer001 0
awww that's not right.... should've punched him in the face
awesomechica1229 5
awww look who's got an old pedophile stalker, dont you just hate when that happens :)
ktbird 0
I was on a train once where this redneck stared at me for 10 minutes straight. I finally had to leave the car and jump in another. I've also had people vomit right by me, but your story takes the cake for creepy shit.
kazumaslayer666 3
staring at you that long is creepy. I take the bus to work and on Monday there was a couplevyhat was arguing on the bus but got silent when I sat down so I kept moving cause they were looking at me for what ever reason but they kept changing seats to be right next to me. I was confused as to why their agriing turned into follow the stranger.
purplemnm 9
omg hahahaha xD I've been hit on by scuzzy old men >.< once, one squeezed my ass, and then another wouldn't stop staring at my rack for like 15 minutes
kazumaslayer666 3
my old teacher used to stare at ever girls chest and claimed he was reading what they said. funny most in my class wore blank shirts.
Serec 0
Yeah I had a pe teacher who'd stare at the girls asses in 6th grade
Pearljammer001 0
why hello there kazumaslayer666 :)
kyonichii 4
My mother pointed out an old guy staring at my ass once. She just laughed at me. Damn pervy old men. D;
purplemnm 9
oh and my lesibian coach had a window cut out of a wall between her office and the girls lockerroom...it was creepy
samantha_durano 6
so far, all of my p.e. teachers have been lesbian, ahaha. but they were pretty awesome.
purplemnm 9
not mine D;
truthisRelative 0
purplemnm, OMG that's disturbing. I mean, you're like 14--sorry if I'm off, I mean no offense but you do look quite young--too. People can be perverts. I hope you slapped that old douche.
purplemnm 9
it happened when I was 14, I just stood there shocked -.-
kazumaslayer666 3
hello again pearljammer :D how's it going?
Physcomerk 0
hey fag, popping pills isn't cool, you're fake.
asianshotty4311 0
that's disgusting and perverted :p
LaLaJuice 0
YDI!!! for not saying something to his nasty ass and getting up and walking away...fail
UrLiFsuX 4
what can an old man say tho? "I'd like to feed you icecream with a *****, my peepee don't work anymore"
gregsdaman 0
41=WIN,and funniest comment
Ep1cPha1l 0
you look like MJ