Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, a pervert was visibly playing with himself right next to me on the train. Then on the bus. Then on the other bus I changed to in order to lose him. At least somebody's interested. FML
Today, on the bus, a man in his late 30s sat next to me. After a moment, he turned to me and said with a wink, "You must be ovulating, I can smell your vagina." FML
Stranger danger
Today, I was talking to an old man I met at a store. He just wanted to know a few things, and he asked about my day. I explained a few bad things that'd happened, then I thanked him for listening. He then asked, "So, how are we gonna do this?" He thought we were gonna fuck. FML
Today, I had to sit through 10 minutes of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML
New creepypasta
Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with, "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML
Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML
Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML
Thanks for sharing
Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML
Top comments
aardvarkish 17
I'm all ears
KaylynKicks 0
oooooo sexy! what a turn on
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Comments (174)
Lee002 8
OP IS MALE ROFL
Serec 0
Old man is cool.
rb2_addict 0
serec, you look JUST like Serj Tankian!!!! google him
bunny911 16
and am I the only one that's noticed OP is a guy? that, for me, makes this 10X creepier.
rb2_addict 0
dude you look like serj tankian from system of a down. so you guys broke up and now my idol is commenting on FMLs... yay me!! =P
perdix 31
"What an asshole!" . . . That's what he said. I probably would have listened bemusedly, until he got around to my tear ducts. By then, it will have become boring, repetitive and implausible.
rachness 0
This perdix, is why I love you
omghehehe 0
hahahaha ;)
waywick 0
awesome! what's an orifice?
bunny911 16
a bodily openning
kkamp516 10
lol was his name Herbert?!?! xD
ImaginaryFoe 1
If it was a crowded bus, where could she go?If it wasn't a crowded bus, he might've followed her. FYL, OP. You really should've reported him to transit police or the driver or just shouted at him to leave you the hell alone.
Bugatti_Veyron 1
oh shit this was posted by a dude
BbYhRtLsS 0
And that's when you say "Are you tryin to get knocked out today?"