Today, while my mom was out, I took the car out to CVS to get some food, even though I'm not legally allowed to drive. As soon as I got back in the car, my mom pulled up 2 parking spaces away from me. She didn't notice me bend down to hide... until I accidentally hit the horn in the process. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I borrowed my dad's car to run a quick errand, which he never lets me do. I thought I’d got away with it until he got home and started yelling. I forgot, dad always reverses into driveways, while I prefer to drive straight in, and I'd parked his car facing the wrong way. FML
Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML
Today, I was trying to do a nice thing and let my friend's mom borrow my car. I went to move my mom's car that was parked behind me so that I could get my car out, and then proceeded to back into my dad's new company car. FML
Today, my mom drove my car and had to make a U-turn on a narrow street. Instead of slowing down, she sped up to turn, running off the road and denting my car. To make things worse, she blamed me for not giving her good directions, then followed that up with, "It's not that bad." FML
Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML
Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML
Today, I illicitly borrowed my dad's car to go to the store, but crashed into my mom's car as she and dad were returning from my grandma's house. Both cars are totalled, my mom is in hospital with a broken collarbone, and I realised dads really can make steam come out their ears if they’re really mad. FML
Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML
Today, while on a road trip, I went to the bathroom at a gas station and locked the door. Turns out the lock was automatic and I'd actually unlocked it. My mom walked in on me, but instead of apologizing and leaving, she yelled at me in the middle of the gas station. FML
Today, I was riding in the backseat while my mom was driving. Noticing she was driving way over the speed limit, I opened a police siren app on my iPod to make her slow down. When she realized, she pulled over, kicked me out of the car and made me walk home. FML
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Top comments
nerdsgetmehot 23
I stopped at "...even though I'm not legally allowed to drive." You're lucky that you didn't get pulled over, dumbass.
FFML_314 12
We all get a bit horny sometimes.
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Comments (160)
Zebidee 9
What are you going to do for your next stunt, OP? Steal a plane that you're not qualified to fly, then whine about that on the internet too?
smallsmerry 0
only if he/she crashes it and has put thier family in years of debt and are now missing a child in the amazon river.
DiamondBTroll 0
you know what I want to hit? never mind, shut up, you touch yourself at night!
vbmg152 19
You know it's 2010, right? You can get almost any food delivered! Even some grocery stores deliver! Who the heck buys food at CVS, the drug store? You deserve it for driving illegally! What food does CVS have that you couldn't live without anyway???
sweet_candy_ 17
Does CVS even sell food?
MoniV6661 0
Of course.
sweet_candy_ 17
Ummm not really.
MoniV6661 0
Yes really. I don't know about Your CVS stores, but here they sell a variety of things. Ranging from food to alcohol or school supplies and hair products to the pharmacy and books. It's like a mini market, I guess.
allmidnighteyes 11
CVS is like a rebranded Walgreens.
vikingunicorn 1
sweet_candy, don't ask a question and then act like the person to answer you is wrong; if you already knew, there's no need to ask-- that is unless you were just making an excuse to be a bitch.
smallsmerry 0
dont complain if you caused the fml. I have no sympathy. fucktard
Ahook1 0
People like you cause accidents that kill!
teeaitch 2
So genius, then what? Did you and your mom race on the way back home?
yourmurderscenex 13
you are a complete idiot. i wish you did get pulled over, that would teach your ass a lesson.
sexychick4510 0
sucks for you
ROFLFail 0
i'm not legally allowed to drive, but i don't just take my parents car to get black ops, sometimes I wonder what this world's coming to
MoniV6661 0
An end, hopefully.