Money: Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming...

By ShowerGirl - 30/04/2013 07:54 - United States

Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 658

You deserved it 5 705

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Stealth mode

By Slipperywhenwet - 28/02/2009 13:08 - United States

Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend myself and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house, but I'd left the radio on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 631

You deserved it 48 170

By Username - 13/12/2010 18:10 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, I was enthusiastically singing one of my favorite songs. When I got out, I noticed a bunch of things missing, and a note on my desk saying "shut the f*ck up, you suck." I was robbed and judged by a thief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 092

You deserved it 4 302

By Anonymous - 18/01/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I arrived at my apartment to find the door kicked in. Inside, I found my TV, Xbox, stereo, CDs, and laptop had all been stolen. When my roommate got home, I told him about it, to which he replied, "Yeah, I left my keys inside this morning, so I kicked the door in to get them." He left with the door kicked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 455

You deserved it 2 563

By Anonymous - 21/07/2009 17:16 - United States

Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 403

You deserved it 60 598

Right place, wrong person

By Anonymous - 11/02/2021 05:01

Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close the door as I've seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 1 133

By XYZee - 22/08/2012 20:27 - United States - Rockmart

Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 949

You deserved it 2 009

Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 15/07/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 531

You deserved it 751

Right place, wrong body

By Anonymous - 26/04/2021 14:00

Today, I came home and heard a noise in the bathroom. I figured it was my girlfriend, so I went over and as the door closed, I told her not to close it because I'd seen her beautiful body before. Turns out it was our roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 279

You deserved it 1 147

You ain't seen me, right?

By Blueberry - 17/09/2012 02:00 - United States - Iowa City

Today, I was showering at my dorm. I had my clothes locked in a locker and my towel and robe hanging outside the stall. Someone took off with my towel and robe, which had my keys. I had to walk down three flights of stairs to get an extra key in nothing but a plastic shower curtain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 237

You deserved it 2 423

By racello13 - 02/11/2015 15:26 - United States - Baldwinsville

Today, I've been robbed. I came home to find my oven door missing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 461

You deserved it 1 815

jjmiller1001 17

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:46

atleast they didn't come after you

Not_Impressed13 9

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:46

Just be glad they didn't take the "I love you" as an invitation..

Comments

abhi95 31

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:42

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

whatthefreshhell 15

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:51

Yes, she should've known and promptly hopped out of the shower, grabbed her double barrel shotgun that she conveniently keeps by the toilet and gone after him. That's what any sane person would've done!

rhysfucker 24

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:57

I prefer a pump myself.

stewpididiot 11

Tuesday 30 April 2013 13:26

I just LOVE sarcasm....

NoFlippinWai 24

Tuesday 30 April 2013 13:54

well it probably wouldnt be the only pump action in the bathroom.

Ameel_fml 19

Tuesday 30 April 2013 15:42

Usually when I call out to someone and they don't reply, I assume they didn't hear me. Not that they're a burglar who's broken into my house.

sikunt89_fml 16

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:44

Robbers need love too I guess... And TV's and stereos by the sound of things.

jjmiller1001 17

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:46

atleast they didn't come after you

whatthefreshhell 15

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:46

Maybe your I love you will make them think about it and return your stuff next time you're in the shower. Unlikely, but not impossible

whatthefreshhell 15

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:49

In a parallel universe I'm a mermaid. Sometimes that's the only thing that gets me through the day.

tvsrockson 6

Tuesday 30 April 2013 13:52

Who knows they might even join you.

Not_Impressed13 9

Tuesday 30 April 2013 12:46

Just be glad they didn't take the "I love you" as an invitation..

ElementaryEdGuy 18

Tuesday 30 April 2013 14:01

Thinking about it, that is a weird way to greet someone. I don't know that I've ever said "I love you" as soon as they walk through the door. Shouldn't she have said something more typical like..."Hello?"