It's sad that we live in a world where we should feel lucky to only get our things stolen

Well it is a valid silver lining, #23. You have a woman in the shower while there are intruders in her home. That is the stuff of nightmares. It certainly could have turned out much worse.

I'm not saying things couldn't have been worse, I'm only saying it's messed up.

Holy crap, that is really freaky!!

hands down best comment story...

Half empty deodorant and TP are big in the black market scene.

Yea, godda smell good while stealing shit!

#28, which would have been soooooo hawt!! They'd probably fist-bump the thief and let him hide in their place in gratitude for getting to see that.

Perdix, I'll stand naked with my shot gun leveled at you. Let's see if you still find me sexy.

#37, that's always how I imagined checking out. Just think how fun my funeral will be when the cause of death was "shot by a hot, naked, young blonde" as opposed to massive organ failure from a degenerative disease. The mourners will probably guess that I had a major organ success! So, I'll come to you with champagne, lube and buckshot (or should I trust that your aim is true enough that you could finish me off with a slug?)

37- Sorry Challan, but most guys like attractive, nude women, and weapons. The only way you could have increased the sex appeal at that point was if you were also leaning up against some overly priced sports car as well. ;) Just saying! :)

Draco, I have a whole arsenal and a jeep... Will that do for now? Thanks for the insight into a mans mind. Finally being a tomboy starts to work for me.

53- O_O And you're single?!? ;D (teasing!) Tomboy's are more fun anyways, my ego has no problems getting it's ass kicked by a girl in Manly activities. :)

#53, that'll work. Please submit some photos with you and your stuff to the funeral home. They'll post them around my casket and I'll become a mythical hero of legend to all of the middle-aged guys. They'll look at their frumpy wives with the Barney Rubble haircuts and think, "Lucky bastard!"

Draco, believe it or not, most men have issues with me being better at the manly arts then they are! Perdix, I will send them immediately. Perhaps I'll even place a fake tattoo of your name on my ass.

#59, start printing the T-shirts with my face on it like the Che Guevara ones and sell them to Urban Outfitters. Customers will ask, "Who is he?" And the salesperson will say, 'Some South American revolutionary." Then they'll ask, "And what about this chump?" And the answer will be, "That dude who was ******* a hot blonde and she shot him." The customer will choose the shirt with me and wear it out of the store. You're going to need the money for your legal defense fund.

Perdix #1 I would wait until you entered my home before shooting you. I'd only level it at you on my property. #2 I'd never be found guilty because no one would ever believe I'd sleep with you.

#62, that's exactly why I'd become a T-shirt-worthy legend -- because I made such an unbelievable miracle happen. As to point #1: Do you think it would be that hard to lure me onto your property? You are the girl in your profile pic, right?

Lol if I didn't know you in the non FML world Perdix, I'd be a bit worried about you. Don't worry though, I won't tell everyone that you're actually a caring and sweet old wanker. That would ruin your rep.

#65, yes, please conceal the "caring and sweet" part -- the "old wanker" IS my rep around here ;)