Today, while eating dinner with my family, I found out my boyfriend recorded me screaming while having sex with him on my phone, and set it as my ring tone on high volume. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to record us having sex and me screaming his name. He set it as my ringtone without telling me. I had my phone volume on high as I was hanging out with my family. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend had changed my ringtone to some woman moaning with pleasure continuously. I found this out in the middle of a job interview when she rang me. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend outside a bar, when a hand on my shoulder yanked me back. I screamed and turned to see my husband glaring at me, with his best friend behind him, recording us on his phone. I'm fucked. FML
Today, I woke up and had a voicemail from my boyfriend. I just thought nothing of it because it was a pocket dial. I decided to listen to it carefully and realized it was him having sex with another girl. FML
Today, my husband played a recording of me breaking wind in my sleep to my whole family at the dinner table. To make matters worse, it was a compilation of different noises from over a long period of time. My family was horrified and my husband seemed proud of himself. FML
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Top comments
ulicki 0
haha, dad must of loved to hear that.
Jessie86 3
Gotta love technology this day and age!
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Comments (158)
funzcpl 0
well at least nobody else has this ringtone. right? RIGHT?
zombiedroogie138 0
I downloaded it already!
jasonhallenbake1 0
newer tooooo
gusgus36 5
I have definitely heard this story before...
KVloveBC 0
me too!
smurf1 0
I know!
cwl727 33
I think that this was a previous FML
RunawayPanda 0
true^^
fullmetalshrimp 0
Well, that's unfortunate. I wonder what your parents had to say about that.
CallMeHush 1
I can imagine the looks of surprise, recognition, embarrasment and condemnation going around the table. Awesome!
funzcpl 0
I know! what do you say after that? "could you please pass the ******, I mean dinner rolls?"
sourgirl101 29
Haha, well who doesn't love dinner rolls?
unique_mamii 0
FAKE, I've read this exact FML a while ago. lol.
zombiedroogie138 0
haha! put em on blast!!!
MrSassypants 34
yeah but a lot of things might happen the same to other people. Like if you go on a city bus, which plenty of stories are like this, there's bound to be someone disgusting sitting next to you at one point but you still them don't you. :)
pinkdisco 3
Or shag her more hahaha.
sinnedrebel 0
bucket list 1 record sex sounds set as ringtone
funzcpl 0
you better not! I know where you live,work,and I cook your meals!
aliaskis 3
out of curiosity, do you actually speak Farsi or did you just find that pic to use as a profile pic?
DocBastard 40
Really? Funz, are you really sinnedrebel's mother? That would explain some things...
sinnedrebel 0
bucket list 1 record sex sounds set as ringtone
funzcpl 0
you better not!
ciscomatic 3
i like that