Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, as soon as I got home, my husband said he was hungry and that I needed to cook. I flipped my shit and yelled at him for a good half hour. Later, he pulled out his phone and showed me videos of me doing the exact thing to him, asking him to do things the second he walked in the door. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were watching TV, I asked him if he loved me. He turned up the volume. FML
Today, I was trying to lower the volume on my TV, but nothing was happening. I got increasingly frustrated, smacking the remote and yelling at the screen. My brain finally woke up when I realized I was holding the air conditioning remote and had been turning my living room into a freezer instead. FML
Today, I tried to get my son off of the couch by turning off the wifi. Afterward, I went to watch tv. Turns out he got me back by turning off the cable. FML
Today, I yelled at my husband for staying out till after 9 and not having done any of the chores. He turned round and yelled right back at me for letting him sit alone at the restaurant, getting sympathy from the waiters, because I clearly forgot today was our anniversary dinner. Whoops. FML
Today, my wife bitched me out 3 times in a row, for things that were not even my fault: for turning my Xbox on, even though I only nudged the button accidentally with my toe; opening a beer when it was actually a Pepsi for our son, and walking loudly when I "know she has a headache," which I didn’t. FML
Today, I shouted at my husband for buying a video game, saying that money wasted on his dumb childish bullshit could be spent on a nice vacation or date night. He quietly packed a bag and left. I'm getting the locks changed. Good riddance. FML
Today, I was watching our home security cameras from work when I saw my husband get home and grab a beer. I activated the camera microphone and told him to put it back and fold the laundry. He flipped off the camera, chugged the beer, and started jacking off on the living room sofa. FML
Today, the TV was blaring, the kids were yelling, and my wife was blabbering on in my ear. Overwhelmed, I shouted, "EVERYONE QUIET!" I got a second of blessed silence before my kids started screaming and crying, and my wife threw a tantrum, saying, "I married a psycho!" FML
Today, after my husband yelled at me for wasting money by getting my nails done, I decided to buy the supplies and watch YouTube to figure out how to do them myself. He then yelled at me for wasting money on the supplies. FML
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Top comments
faxe 0
Your husband is a hero to nagged husbands everywhere.
happykiddo20 0
loool xDD u should try leaving him some peace, every man wants their free time with no women and no work but that was funny xDDD
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Comments (90)
cmac86 24
did you take that as a hint to shut up? besides, why are you talking to him when you should be cooking and cleaning?
beastly13 0
lololol i went "ooooooooh snap" when i read this. high five
Music131 0
you should have played along, getting quieter and quieter, and make him think he's crazy...it could work...lol
Szaszaspasz 26
My thoughts exactly!
COBRAMORPH 0
Maybe your mouth shoulda been running on his ****.
george456 0
He wins. You fail.
caomei 0
hmmmm. Rhys a nice way to tell someone to shut up ....maybe I'll try it on my grandma the next time she doesn't shut up
kirbaski 0
#24 ROFL!!!!! that was priceless!!
sugarbabyxoxo 2
wow do non of you have morals! you don't end a ******* marrige over tv! maybe if one is unfaithful than yah! but come the **** on guys. and op who ******* cares he probably bought it. get back in the kitchen and continue making sammich's!
JonathanSchmold 0
The pleb you are a major @$$ hole!!! GIRLS ARE NOT TOOLS AND THEY SHOULD BE RESPECTED!!! Just because you FINALLY grew a set doesn't mean you can act like that!!! TAKE THIS FROM A 14 YEAR OLD BOY!!!
southpointchrysl 0
this is so old I've heard this one a milllion times
bradlyl 0
that's classic! haha you have to admit that's sitcom material. but that dosnt mean your husband isn't a total ass