Today, was the first day all week I got to sleep in. I woke up this beautiful morning to the sun shining in my window and hundreds of carpenter ants crawling over my sheets and me. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was gently awoken by my daylight alarm clock. So were about 15 wasps that had started building their nest underneath my bed. FML
Today, I got up, curtains still closed, and in the dim light noticed something dark on the floor, which wasn’t there yesterday. I turned on the light to find out what it was. A tiny ant hill. FML
Today, I got up feeling refreshed and positive for the first time in ages, so I happily threw my window open to greet the beautiful morning. A bee flew into my eye. FML
Today, I decided to take a nap in the park. I found a nice shady spot and closed my eyes. When I woke up, I realized I had fallen asleep on an ant hill. My entire body was riddled with ants. FML
Today, and for the first time in months, I woke up feeling well rested and ready to face the day. At 7pm. FML
Today, I was sleeping in my bed when I felt an itch on my arm. Then another. Then another. I finally looked to see what was going on, only to find a bunch of ants crawling in my bed. They were somehow getting in through the closed window. Guess I’m done sleeping tonight. FML
Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML
Today, I woke up on the top bunk of my bed with the birds chirping. I felt so energized, I gave a big stretch, and my hand hit the ceiling. I accidentally pushed the ceiling board up and lots of tiny spiders fell on me and my bed. FML
Today, I woke up early to weird scratching and smacking noises. After gathering enough courage to check what it was, I found out it was just an ant stuck on a piece of paper. FML
Today, a colony of ants announced that they'd moved into my bedroom closet as I went to get dressed for work. FML
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Top comments
my_fml_account 2
Carpenter ants? This FML is funnier in my head when I imagine they're building tiny scaffolding around you, and fixing your broken chair. oh and FYL
lonely_wife 0
I know I'd FREAK OUT!
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Comments (82)
ihatestupidppl 0
At least it wasn't like, fire ants or something. Those little guys are assholes.
_THE_MASTER_ 0
true. very true... can't wait to mod out his lame FML's too, thus pushing him over the edge into stage 3
yowzerz 5
Hmm, FYL but at least you got to sleep in. It would suck to wake up stupid early to find ants all over you.
tmptmptmp 0
could be worse. could be IRS agents.
GoHere 0
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fmh123 0
RAID everything
Aoife 0
Ohmygod, that's TERRIBLE. x_x Holy hell, I'd have freaked out. I woke up once with ONE ant crawling up my wall. I freaked out and sprayed my room with way too much bug spray. I'm myrmecophobic. FYL.
plexico 4
A little advice: don't come to Texas. We don't have myrmecophobia, because fear of ants is not unreasonable or irrational, it's smart. We've got these fire ants and just one can give you a bite that will burn at first and then be itchy for days. They suck!
NewLight8421 0
i live in texas: yes they are EVERYWHERE no i have not had that happen before yes they seem to always bite ME and no one else
taintedtruffle 42
I have never been bit by ants but they are like one of the only three bugs I'm afraid of- i'm a grown adult but i would cry if one ever bit me
Zodikosis 0
I'd probably pass out from fright.
zach2556 0
OHMYGOD! CATCH EM AND MAKE AN ANT FARM!!!!
Pandasaur 0
Yikes. That probably felt like waking up in a horror movie. D: FYL.