Today, the girl I've been dating dumped me after she found out I'm originally from Alabama. Apparently she doesn't want to date someone from a "foreign country". We both live in Michigan. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend of six weeks dumped me when she learned that Macedonia, where I was born, is in Europe. Apparently, she thought that I was "Asian" and she doesn't want to date a "white guy." Yeah, I'm totally confused too. FML
Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend due to our long distance relationship. She then agreed to date my best friend who lives in the same town as me. FML
Today, I saw my ex-girlfriend. She dumped me because she was moving to Wyoming. I guess Wyoming is code for my friend's apartment. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend's parents offered her a trip to Europe if she dumped me. She accepted, and broke up with me. Her parents were lying. FML
Today, my girlfriend of almost a year, and to whom I intended to propose on Thanksgiving, dumped me because her husband will be returning from Iraq soon. And he wants to have a "talk" with me. I didn't know she was married. FML
Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after finding out my parents are divorced. Same reason my last three girlfriends broke up with me. FML
Today, my longtime crush, who lives in Texas, got into a relationship. He turned me down when I'd confessed my feelings for him because he “doesn’t do long distance.” The girl he’s with lives in the same city as me. We both live in Florida. FML
Today, I ran into a guy I knew from 3 years ago. He just moved here from out of state and is planning to stay forever. This is the same guy who dated me long distance and dumped me after a while because he “couldn’t handle long distance.” He just got engaged to a girl who lives here. FML
Today, I was watching a movie at my girlfriend's house with her and her parents. There was a part where a brother and sister kissed, so I said "where'd they come from, Alabama?" Today is also the day I found out my girlfriend's parents are from Alabama. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
CaptainSmith28 19
Move back to Alabama. I'll bet even there you'll find someone more educated than that.
Nilorak 24
Sweet home Alabama.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (164)
KatNamanski 16
Do you really want to be with someone so far less intelligent than you?
Voij 16
My guess is... yes, he does. OP said that they "have been dating", which implies that they've been together for 'some time'. We can fairly safely assume that this was not the very first time that her lack of general knowledge/ignorance towards worldly matters has presented itself. This makes me feel as though he knew of this downside, but decided to ignore it over her other assets.
Pleonasm 36
Well intelligence isn't everything. Plus, ignorance in areas=/=intelligence. Anyway, I find that to spend time/love/fancy/whatever someone you don't necessarily need to be on the same page in every aspect. Maybe just the most simple of emotional connections suffice. That that person in particular gets you, understands you, or makes you tick? Other hobbies, interests and interesting uniquenesses maybe?
aire101 16
Either that or she was just a fine piece of @**...
Pleonasm 36
I'm sorry, that last word was illegible. Speaking in english and without silly and mostly useless censorship would help with my comprehension. Not trying to be an @$§ or anything.
aire101 16
I would think it more indeciferable than illegible since it wasn't hand written. Perhaps unintelligible?
Pleonasm 36
Illegible. I literally couldn't read it, that's how bad it was. Legibility isn't contingent on whether it is hand-written or not. Also: il·leg·i·ble (ĭ-lĕj′ə-bəl) adj. Not legible or decipherable.
aire101 16
Oh! So you did mean all three then since they're all synonyms. Well my apologies that such a simple symbol substitution offended your delicate sensibilities! Next time i will certainly keep in mind that not everyone is capable of abstract thinking and all vulgarities must be spelled out directly in order to be fully comprehended. My own amusement at your paltry attempt to stroke your ego by picking apart my joke aside, i would like to say one last thing- ¥0μ m@¥ n07 |3€ 4n @$$ |3μ7 ¥0μ m4|
vipirius 18
I always found it funny how people felt the need to censor out swear words on a website called "**** My Life".
Marley_000 14
What the hell is this? "You may not be an ass but you mal?" Seems text language has bested you again.
CurlyQute 17
Maybe it's good that you're broken up... She isn't very bright.
alphabetta 23
Lol. You should've played along; talking in gibberish and calling it 'your country's language', mixing together random [disgusting] ingredients and calling it 'your country's national dish', and lastly, taking her least favorite song and calling it 'your country's national anthem' ;)
A_Perfect_Circle 12
You will be better off with someone that won't even take the time to understand something about you, if she really like you she wouldn't care where you are from and would just focus on keeping you
trayne13 3
I think you missed the FML.
CorpsmanUp88 21
Why would you find some one from up north. they are different than the Sweet as tea girls from down here.
pricelys 7
Hey ya tool, we are the same up here as they are down there except we actually have to put on clothes for winter and don't have a drawl
imbedderdenu 23
not all of us are that bad...but your right. bless your heart
MeAnd 9
Tell her that you are citizen now, and that you are settling down in the US. She might take you back. Lol
Lebeaugars95 20
well doodly don diddly doo, I think it might be because it's not a country
NightHawk387 22
She must have been thinking of Albania. Either way she is a moron for not knowing the difference.
Epikouros 32
No, it's an Arab county, the one Barack Hussein al-Obama was named after.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Not only is she really ignorant of her own country's geography but she also sounds xenophobic if she rejects someone only because they are foreigners. Not a great loss it seems.
sassy2085 16
Sounds like a keeper!
martin8337 36
Not!