Today, my partner told me that he will never initiate sex again, all because six months ago I got him worked up then didn’t follow through. I didn’t follow through because I got pissed at him for throwing a cigarette butt into an environmentally sensitive creek. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend asked me for sex and when I said no, he asked me to leave. When I demanded to know why, he told me I had reached his limit: if I denied him sex for longer than 6 weeks in a row then clearly I’m not interested in an adult relationship, and need to get the hell out. Asshole. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he’s no longer interested in sex with me, as he just can't be bothered. FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked why I’ve been so grumpy lately. When I told him it’s because our relationship has been severely lacking in intimacy, he sighed heavily and said, “Ugh, fine, let’s just get it over with!” Gee, thanks babe. FML
Today, after weeks of begging my boyfriend of almost two years to have sex with me, he told me to find someone else to fuck. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex, but every time he thrust into me, he farted. Loud, smelly, wet farts. After a minute, I shoved him off and demanded he take a dump. After a full five minutes of loud diarrhea, he came back to bed, his ass stinking of sewage. My pussy dried up so fast… FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said that I tried to initiate sex too often, and that made me emasculating and unladylike. According to him, men should be the ones to initiate, and women should wait until the man does so. Sorry for wanting sex more than once every other month. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
Today, I had my first sexual experience since going through a rough break up a month ago. The guy finished after 60 seconds of a blow job and then didn’t return the favor. FML
Today, my girlfriend raged furiously at me for never initiating sex. The reason I haven't been initiating is because she was on a medically-ordered sex ban, and she "forgot to tell me" that her doctor had cleared her two weeks ago. She's still mad at me, and there's still no sex. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
bigredmonkeybutt 30
The struggles of an eco-warrior are hard.
smoochmysnoot 6
Did you tell him why you were upset and didn’t follow through? Or did you just “let him figure it out on his own”?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (2)
bigredmonkeybutt 30
The struggles of an eco-warrior are hard.
smoochmysnoot 6
Did you tell him why you were upset and didn’t follow through? Or did you just “let him figure it out on his own”?