Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while shopping in the baby department at a local department store, a woman approached me asking when I was due. I told her that I was due in 4 months. I lied. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, a stranger at the grocery store rubbed my belly and asked me when I'm due. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML
Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, my boyfriend is so ashamed of me that when someone asked how far along my pregnancy is, he quickly replied "5 months now!" instead of telling them I'm not actually pregnant. FML
Today, I told a coworker I loved her cute baby bump, and asked when 'the little guy' was due. She glared at me and said, “I had the baby two months ago. You saw him a month ago, here, in this office.” FML
Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML
Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML
Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML
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Top comments
Rico_Mal1116 0
Go with the flow all ways works.
tehspy1337 0
Next time say "it's yours"
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Comments (203)
ogtwag 2
ydi, fatass
Darrian 2
I don't think that your life sucks, nor do I think that you deserved it, but I do think that is pretty effing funny. Time to do some situps?
jren207 24
Now all you need to do is go and make a real baby.
luvluvEgla 5
Haha that should be ur hint... U obviously gotta loose weight if ur mistaken 4 a pregnant chick:/ smh
fuhfuhfuhfuckit 4
You should have said, "I'm not pregnant, I just have a massive cancerous tumor. Thanks for pointing it out."
penguinazul 13
I feel bad for OP. Even if you are fat, if you look pregnant, that means you carry most of your weight in your gut, thus she really doesn't have "curves". She's like a woman with a man-beer gut. That would suck to have that kind of body type! There was this woman on a wedding gown show fitting plus sized women for dresses, and she said the best thing I've ever heard: "Full-figured does not mean 'no figure'." Which means yes, even big girls can be curvy. People are so ignorant.
ReynshineCutting 10
I've heard that too and it's so true. I'm bigger than I want to be but I can still look damn sexy and my fiancé can never keep his hands off of me!
penguinazul 13
If your waist is smaller than your hips, you have a figure, and should dress yourself to enhance it! -nodnodnod-
horserider15 3
okay so thus is really random but I saw your picture and I want to know where you got the horn I'm totally going to get one for my horse to wear
unixdude 9
This is only a FML if op is a man.
metallicshadow 16
i would straight out just say "im not pregnant bitch" and walk away
whitneyphan1520 0
so mean.......
kmdiggs 0
that's sad.