Today, my son's teacher told me that I should take my son to the doctor, because he has been complaining of bad headaches. They ran some tests, and then removed a peanut that's apparently been lodged in his nose for months. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my husband took our 5-month-old to the doctor, who diagnosed him with a severe sinus blockage and referred us to a specialist. This is the third major health problem with our son that our husband has picked up before I did. My job? I’m a nurse in a paediatric clinic. FML
Today, I took my 2-year-old son to the ear doctor, since he'd stopped responding whenever I call him. The doctor told me that his ears are just fine. He's just ignoring me. FML
Today, I got a call from my son's school. He was in the nurse office puking. I picked him up and the dumbass said he'd eaten one of those stupid "WORLD'S HOTTEST SNACK" things and it made him sick. Idiot. No sympathy whatsoever from me. FML
Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML
Today, one of the kids I was babysitting had a severe peanut allergy, and he looked me dead in the eye as he ate a peanut bar before I could stop him. His sister swore up and down that I made him eat it. Guess who the parents believed, even after I rushed him to the hospital. FML
Today, my parents brought me to the doctor because I was "faking" a headache. One thing led to another, and it turns out I have a tumor pressing against my spine. FML
Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML
Today, I found out my son kept quiet about having head lice for a week. He's 14. FML
Today, I learned how hard it is to remove peanut butter from your own eye. FML
Today, I picked my son up from school, and asked how his day went. He told me how his friend explained to him that his mommy snorts sugar with his uncle, and if he could try what his friend's mom calls "Booger sugar" when we got home. FML
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Top comments
letitbe56 0
How old is this son? Always include an age--I was picturing him as 12 or so until the last line when I realized this is probably preschool. And why was the teacher the first to notice that he had been complaining for months about headaches?
metakingt 0
So your son won the "who can shove a peanut the farthest up their nose" game?
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Comments (90)
Wet_Dream 0
before you know it, he's putting stuff op his ass..
kombucha_fml 8
wow that's something Homer would do!
ergo_fml 13
More like **** his life...
BlackBloodRose 0
fyl? poor kid!!
Shmoopie4 0
Oh god. Idiots all around. Now that I live in North Carolina, I'm not surprised one bit that this FML came from my state. Oy...
kellster 2
How did it take your son's teacher to notice his constant headaches? Parenting fail!
italianprincess8 0
I totally stuck a peanut up my nose when I was little!!! It just didn't stay up there cuz my mom saw it happen lmao.
wowyourbeat 0
so your kid is a retard?
blastvortex 4
FYL? Don't you mean "FHL?" After getting that peanut removed, I hope you scolded him butt-good, got him a good kiddie shrink, or both.
Professor59 2
YDI for ignoring your son's complaints about headaches for months until he had to complain to his teacher to get help.