Today, my son became convinced that his father cheated and we put the fertilized egg inside me to cover the whole thing up. He won't stop calling me "host mother". FML
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By
Kiernan151
| 25
Is he special or something? Where did he get an idea like that?
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MariaGiovanni
| 25
Did you really have to go there? Come on its 2016.
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NotPatSajak
| 11
Its 2016, why'd you go and have to get so offended?
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Kiernan151
| 25
I wasn't trying to offend anyone or anything, I was asking a serious question. I have two family membera with Mental Retardation. I was just trying to see if there was any issues that would contribute to him thinking that. Why is everyone so sensitive?
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shannonmarie38
| 11
Because it IS 2016 & everything offends everyone. ?
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Redgy22
| 25
Because on FML everyone is overly sensitive about everything & quick to lash out about punctuation.
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guii_fml
| 24
Everyone on this app is a crybaby bitch that gets offended by everything and they all go yeah itll get better yeah well it might but thats just life everyone needs to stop being so sensitive and just live their damn lives thats why i avoid the comment section on this app bc everyone all of a sudden becomes a therapist and needs to justify their existence
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GroupWorkSucks
| 15
Come on you guys, it's !
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9a_1z
| 12
26, I now have that Avril Lavigne song stuck in my brain but with 'offended' instead of 'complicated'. This ear-worm is offensive.
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writerchic85
| 25
I think if he was retarded he wouldn't have such a complex thought process as to come to that conclusion.
And yes I said retarded.
And yes I said retarded.
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tlnorman
| 18
Too many negative votes, comment buried.
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Kiernan151
| 25
Although if he was told it 55, he could believe it and be able to repeat it. My cousin (who is mentally retarded) was told that the his mother was actually an overweight Asian lady and his father was a skinny Black man and they they bonded together like reverse cell reproduction, and he was able to repeat it to him mom and dad. So it may not have been his thought process. And I don't care if you use the word retarded,I use it too.
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Kiernan151
| 25
And I don't really care what you call it 57, I'm going to call it Mental Retardation.
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Love_L0ST
| 13
Except that saber gets or something like that actually makes you smarter just more socially awkward
By
Memeosaurus
| 14
And what gave him this idea?
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cocacola999
| 27
I'm guessing creepy film + asshole sibling/older relative.
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Murilirum
| 23
As an older brother, I can confirm that #19 makes a very strong argument.
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renouttaluck
| 20
Sounds like something I would have told my sister for leverage XD
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Emirac
| 10
I'm with #19 on the sibling thing. I'm the baby and my older siblings told me I was adopted all the time because I had slightly slanted eyes. I took it in stride though and put up a photo of my "real parents," some random Asian couple, by my bed.
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cocacola999
| 27
I myself once convinced my baby sister and her friends on a sunny day that a tornado was coming - because "the weather is always nice before a tornado". My parents never figured out how she got that idea.
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POSGirly
| 7
When I was three my older sister told me Elmo was dead, and I kept repeating it until my mother got me a talking Elmo toy in the middle of the night to show me he wasn't dead, to this day she denies it.
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delude
| 26
45 that sucks but at the same time is hilariously adorable
By
srhearrell
| 21
Probably just a phase. I'm sure he'll eventually get tired of it. Good luck, OP.
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slingerslasher
| 24
ah yes, the classic "host mother" phase of adolescence
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Talonshere
| 14
People saying "It's just a phase" annoys me more than imaginable.
By
O0hdear
| 21
how old is your son?
By
hellnosucka
| 27
he finally uncovered your dirty little secret.
By
moocowmilk0
| 19
How did this happen? we need a follow up story OP!
By
YumeWolf
| 23
Wow, that must be shitty for you to hear, OP. But I'm sure you will convince him eventually!
By
SoulEaterSE
| 23
Your son needs to realize that that's impossible
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antisolid87
| 5
#9, It's completely possible as surrogate mother's exist.
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KryssLB
| 14
They do; but you can't take an embryo that has already implanted in one woman's uterus and magically transport it into another woman's uterus. We do not have that technology.
Was his biological mother an egg donor, that was fertilized in the lab and then implanted into the woman who actually carried him to term (which is the closest actual scientific thing to what he is describing)? Well, no, probably not, because if that was true then this probably wouldn't be an FML, now, would it?
I think the kid (whom I get the impression is old enough to know better) is just an idiot.
FYL, OP. FYL.
Was his biological mother an egg donor, that was fertilized in the lab and then implanted into the woman who actually carried him to term (which is the closest actual scientific thing to what he is describing)? Well, no, probably not, because if that was true then this probably wouldn't be an FML, now, would it?
I think the kid (whom I get the impression is old enough to know better) is just an idiot.
FYL, OP. FYL.
By
AC98
| 19
Stop lying, op, he knows the truth
By
Crazion
| 26
That's a really creative kid you got there.
Sounds plausible.