Love: Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked...

By Anonymous - 22/07/2016 22:01

Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked him out, and he stood outside the door calling my name until he saw my roommate coming down the hall. They both came in and he acted like nothing happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 961

You deserved it 1 119

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 12/11/2009 20:34 - Canada

Today, my roommate's boyfriend moved in. I'm in love with him. Now I get to live with the happy couple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 106

You deserved it 9 649

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 22:50 - France

Today, my boyfriend moved. He moved from my room... to my housemate's room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 667

You deserved it 3 607

By Adrian James - 09/07/2019 12:00

Today, I got into a fight with my roommate's girlfriend's best friend. A few hours later, they had me evicted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 712

You deserved it 250

By Anonymous - 02/03/2011 11:20 - United States

Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 572

You deserved it 6 325

Coinkydink

By Anonymous - 21/01/2022 08:01 - Belgium - Roeselare

Today, my roommate told me he was bringing home his new girlfriend. When the arrived, he introduced me to… my longtime crush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 310

You deserved it 195

By HousemateHorror - 20/11/2017 19:00

Today, I walked into my dorm to find the guy I have feelings for sleeping with my roommate. I signed a lease with them for next year and can't back out now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 256

You deserved it 573

Roid rage incoming

By screwed - 22/12/2010 17:56 - Canada

Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 349

You deserved it 4 282

Assumptions

By 181999 - 14/09/2013 20:47 - United States - Essex Junction

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 445

You deserved it 54 337

By YaytoSeniorYear - 05/09/2017 20:00

Today, my roommate revealed that she's dating my ex. I later had to navigate around them caressing each other just to grab my noodles from the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 814

You deserved it 293

By theRoomie - 02/11/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, my loser roommate got wasted. He comes to me before going to bed, tells me he loves me, tries to hug me, then explosively vomits all over my face, my hair, my clothes. Then spends the rest of the night retching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 807

You deserved it 2 832

domolovesyoshi 33

Saturday 23 July 2016 20:27

Next time he does it record it

totallynotemily 25

Saturday 23 July 2016 20:25

I hope your roommate dumped that bastard.

Comments

LAURA_EL_JUICE 6

Monday 25 July 2016 18:18

Run, move quick. But if you dont record it so you have proof for your roommate then move.

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Today, I drove to a job interview. I had to sneeze, but because I was driving on the highway, I didn't let go of the wheel to cover my mouth. I didn't know the sneeze was a "productive" one until I was sitting in the interview, looked down at my new blouse, and saw the giant lugie sitting there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 408

You deserved it 8 930

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 006

You deserved it 21 832

The Top

Today, while at a fast food restaurant, I wanted to wash my hands. The restrooms were locked, so a cashier got the key and opened the men's restroom. This would have been fine if I wasn't a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 221

You deserved it 2 125

Today, I broke a toe. It was not too bad and I can still walk, but the doctors had to tape it to the next toe to help it heal. Turns out I am allergic to the glue on the tape. The pain of the blisters covering two toes and the itch is worst than the break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 527

You deserved it 232

Today, I broke a tooth. It’s Friday. Not a single dentist office is open. The good news? I might lose those last few pounds as I can’t drink or eat without excruciating pain. Needless to say, it’s going to be a long weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 682

You deserved it 260

Today, a customer came to my shop and asked our shop assistant if we had Smart TVs. She replied, "No we only have LG and Samsung." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 072

You deserved it 424

Today, I got in trouble for following the rules at work. This is the third workplace where this has happened. Each time, when I provided the written document that showed the rules that I followed, I was told, "Well…" Don't make it a "rule" if it's really going to be a guideline with 50+ possible exceptions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 114

Today, my girlfriend got pissed because she thought she heard me masturbating in the bathroom. I was brushing my teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 379

You deserved it 1 911

Same thing different taste

Coinkydink

Roid rage incoming

Assumptions

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