Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be funny to change my ringtone to some guy crooning "Thank heaven for little girls" and then call me during today's teacher-parent conference. FML
Today, I was giving a lecture to my class I heard a phone go off. Aggravated and exhausted, I asked everyone to turn their phones off. Then the phone rang again. I lost my shit and spent the next half hour calling my students a bunch of "technology whores". Then I realized the phone was mine. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML
Today, I was on a conference call while in the bathroom with all the important people in my district. I thought my phone was on mute, so I took the opportunity to flush the toilet. Turns out, that my phone wasn't on mute, and everyone heard it. I'm the only one who was on the conference call outside of work. FML
Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML
Today, I had a job interview for the perfect job. My phone rang in my pocket. I’d forgotten to silence it. The worst part? The ringtone was a guy saying “Pussy!” on a continuous loop. The interviewer chewed me out for being “unprofessional” and kicked me out. I have no idea who set that ringtone. FML
Today, I missed an important phone call. It's been so long since someone has called me that I didn't recognize my own ringtone. FML
Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML
Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML
Today, my phone rang during a meeting. I quickly silenced it, and put it in my pocket. A few minutes later, my boss’s phone rang. It was me, butt-dialing him while we were sitting in the same room. He answered and asked if I had something urgent to discuss. I did not. FML
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Top comments
mario2012 18
Was your phone also on vibrate?
sledshredder163 14
That's the kinda reason I don't let my friends use my phone at all.
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Comments (46)
Squygm 7
Your phone shouldn't have been on in the first place, or at the very least it should have been on vibrate for emergencies.
ErinRosado 14
And this is why people protect their phones with pin codes, etc.
AUShano 15
I hooooOOOOOOoope everyone undersTAAAAANDS!
rivaraven 35
That's why you never let your friends use your phone.
warsun 27
OP's friend(s) probably took it at one point and secretly changed the tone. Not sure OP would let them use the phone
91hayek 31
I think you really mean the SOUND of a woman having an ******. Changing it to a woman having an ****** is just putting it on vibrate and sticking it in some woman's cooch. Now that's some damn good coverage if it actually works.
mario2012 18
You're trying too hard.
iAlissa 34
This legitimately made me uncomfortable
briang959 47
Change his ringtone to the sound of a sheep having an ******.
91hayek 31
ewe!
Rallred32 20
23, you're trying too hard again.
momogal 22
But now you match Sherlock. You can just tell people that The Woman (aka Irene Adler) is texting you.
theaaxis 27
I was waiting for someone to bring this up :)
rec_chem 22
That's why phones LOCK!
vlalam 24
Can I borrow ur friend? I need a crazy friend like urs
Cristina41 8
It's not that bad, it would have really sucked if you left your phone in the conference room.
goldensnitch0011 4
That's what she did....