Miscellaneous: Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating...

By Anonymous - 12/03/2013 04:43 - United States

Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voice when I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech them whenever someone comes into the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 180

You deserved it 9 258

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Same thing different taste

By sexual parrot - 21/04/2014 18:42

Today, my boyfriend's parents' parrot won't stop imitating my sex moans, and keeps doing it whenever I speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 633

You deserved it 16 114

Enjoy the sirens

By Anonymous - 17/03/2023 04:00

Today, my parrot learned how to imitate my baby's crying. Now, every time the baby cries, the parrot joins in, and it sounds like a chorus of screaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 851

You deserved it 169

By Moanie - 15/03/2009 22:45 - United States

Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 351

You deserved it 29 505

By Zannanana - 30/10/2018 05:00

Today, I realised my parrot loves to masturbate on anything soft I own, like my sweater, house socks, blanket, and even my hair bun on the top of my head. I only realised this when my boyfriend pointed out that my parrot was humping my bun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 735

You deserved it 324

By MacGrouber - 17/03/2011 00:12 - United States

Today, my bird learned to mimic my fire alarm. It proved it to me at 3 am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 843

You deserved it 4 743

By weep weep weep - 12/03/2012 03:04 - United States

Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 920

You deserved it 3 839

By Anonymous - 09/06/2016 19:39 - Germany - Munich

Today, I have to look after my best friend's parrot for a few days. One minute out of the room, I came back in to find out that the parrot had taught my three-year-old the word "slut". Now the two won't stop screaming "slut" throughout the whole house. My wife thinks both learned the word from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 219

You deserved it 1 145

By Anonymous - 13/10/2010 14:03 - United States

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, her pet bird whistled a tune she'd been trying to teach it. She stopped and congratulated it, and I took the chance to move it to the other room to prevent further distraction. She got mad and wouldn't let me back in bed because I just "untrained it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 466

You deserved it 7 695

By Anonymous - 18/04/2019 00:00

Today, my bird learned how to mimic the fire alarm after my dad has been testing them for the last few months. He now enjoys sounding like a fire alarm anytime I turn the lights off with the other bird joining in. They live in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 025

You deserved it 272

What did you say?

By What? - 22/01/2013 19:00 - Australia

Today, I found out my ten year-old brother and his best friend have taught our new parrot to say, "Shut up, bitch." We have a bunch of our extended family coming over tomorrow to see what the parrot can say. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 651

You deserved it 4 108

Ukeee_X 19

Tuesday 12 March 2013 12:09

You let your parrot see/hear those things? I couldn't do it with an audience. Again, you should get a gag.

karlcolt45 19

Tuesday 12 March 2013 12:09

I don't think I could keep my compass pointed north with a parrot in the room...you must have a very accommodating boyfriend

Comments

Conasaur 8

Tuesday 12 March 2013 12:21

Time to start screaming awesome movie lines in bed.

megank12 17

Tuesday 12 March 2013 12:22

Is your parrot named Robert Plant?

Enslaved 36

Tuesday 12 March 2013 12:32

"Shake for me, girl. I wanna be your backdoor man." When I first heard Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love", I thought Robert Plants moans sounded more like he was getting ready to sneeze! :P

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 12 March 2013 18:31

I sang that song out loud in front of my mom when I was in middle school, before I understood what the words really meant. Couldn't look her in the eye for a long time after she set me straight.

Jac_d_ipper 10

Tuesday 12 March 2013 12:33

You can now train the parrot to help whenever you want to fake it.

buddy51 23

Tuesday 12 March 2013 12:51

"Polly wants a delicious cream pie and a Minnesota Hot Pocket to go!!"

PipingMouse 14

Tuesday 12 March 2013 13:02

That parrot must be pretty smart to learn so many noises. It's be funny of you used it for a prank.

BellaBelle_fml 23

Wednesday 13 March 2013 1:24

Parrots are very intelligent birds. They have the mental capacity to learn a vast vocabulary and have the intelligence to form coherent sentences instead of merely mimicking sounds, words, and phrases that they have heard or have been taught. I have heard of parrots that can carry on conversations and respond to questions and statements. Of course not every breed of parrot can and not every parrot in the same breed as the ones who can have the same ability.

perdix 29

Tuesday 12 March 2013 13:03

The wording of this story is disturbing -- the OP calls his or her mom and dog and then sex noises follow. The yuck meter has been pegged!

sugarshane007 20

Tuesday 12 March 2013 13:10

Come on OP, the parrot is just trying to inform your neighbors of the fun that can be had at your place. Don't look at it negatively, instead, turn it into an advertising opportunity!