By peniswoman - United Kingdom - Paisley
  Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML
Add a comment
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account Sign in
Top comments
  Cazz91  |  21

Just talk to him about it so he might not do that to you again. I say that because he may just do it again despite what you tell him or it's possible your bf was just horsing around with you and thought you would have laughed at his immaturity with him.

  FYsocks  |  11

She sounds stuck up as hell. God forbid someone open up and be silly around another person. Must be a sign of a horrible person to have a sense of humor. Damn.

  TheAuditor  |  4

Uuuuuhhhh... hobknocker? Is that a UK term, or a homo-hate term, or what? I'm not really sure what to think of that. Either way, the dude sounds like a pretty free spirit to me. If OP's anus is too tight, try some lube, in conjunction with the penis mans powers... Should loosen things up a bit.

By  perdix  |  29

I guess since you are dating man-child, you survived the beating and could write the FML. If he were a man, he'd have knocked you out (and them maybe up).

  perdix  |  29

I think you are misreading. I'm talking about whacking her with his dick. It would be hyperbole to think someone with even a large package developing enough torque to knock someone out.

  Welshite  |  39

In that case, I apologize.

I suppose that would explain the trail of unconscious women you leave behind. I always thought they swooned at the sight of you, but apparently I've been mistaken all along.

  perdix  |  29

Blame the Zumba! All that hip thrusting in class has helped me develop concussive junk torque. I wonder how the ladies in my class are savaging their husbands/boyfriend with their newfound pelvic power.

By  darwinism  |  30

Put a towel around your head and walk around naked saying you are the "Ocean Clam" then sit on his face and see if he can find your pearl.

Wait. Maybe that will just encourage him more.

FYL indeed