Today, my mom scooped the litter box right before I went to work. I brown bagged my lunch this morning. She brown bagged the poop from the litter box. Both were on the counter. Guess which one I brought to work? FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went to the bathroom. On my way back, I found a small piece of trash in the hallway so I picked it up. It was cat poop. FML
Today, my roommate finally cleaned her cat's very full litter box. I later found our only good spatula crusted with kitty feces, which she'd left on the kitchen counter for me to find. FML
Today, I brought my lunch to work in the only box I had lying around my apartment - a small one from FedEx. When I went to the bathroom before lunch, I returned to my desk to find that one of my coworkers had mailed my lunch back to my apartment. FML
Today, I thought my mother was coming into my room to give me lunch. She gave me cleaning supplies instead. FML
Today, I went to drop the garbage in the compactor as I left to do some shopping. I quickly put my handbag down on the side, threw the 'garbage' in the machine, watched it do its thing, and then turned round to find... the bag of garbage on the side. FML
Today, my mom told me to take out the trash. I thought it would be a good idea to Hulk-smash it into the can. I missed. The bag ripped and garbage flew everywhere. FML
Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML
Today, when I got home from work exhausted and literally ready to fall over, my mom had me carry several heavy bags of dog food for her. Yesterday, it was coals; before that it was horse feed and gas bottles. Before that, I'd just asked her to keep the hard, physical work to the weekends. FML
Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML
Today, I woke up, got up, and felt something crunchy under my feet. My son thought it would be funny if he spread cat litter all around the house. Used cat litter. FML
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Top comments
Jordan10la 0
Put it in the fridge at your work. I hear people steal lunches all the time at some places.
madame_fml 0
Ewww O_o you didn't realize the smell at all?
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Comments (128)
propelks09 0
102...i don't think this is a place for dissing cats ..no one cares
star_ver 0
How old are you that Mommy's still making you a sack lunch?
DeeJayD 0
She put a bag of shit on the counter!? That's ******* disgusting, people put food there. Hygiene issues, there. @#102: Dogs smell, you have to bathe them all the time, they shit all over, they slobber all over you, they bark and make a lot of noise when you're trying to concentrate or sleep... @#104: How dumb are you that you didn't notice he said he bagged his own lunch, strongly implying he also made it himself? Shut up and think.
cypher_sonic 0
True or not, I've never laughed so hard. Thanks for making my day.
squelchy451 0
jeez he could have had his mom staying over the weekend or something there's not enough evidence to say that chriss is a middle-aged person who stays with his mom, making him a pathetic person. That totally sucks
lisajean 0
Can I ask you why you're: a) still at home; b) hanging out at home with mommy; c) having mommy make your bagged lunch
greeneggsnsam 0
bwahahahaha xD ..but, really. thatwould suck.
Dejavu2 0
LMAO, #88. It made me LOL. And this FML is faved. Funny as hell, no matter how old this OP is or who packed their lunch. (I'm aware that it was the OP themself.) Or even who put what where. Some of you people tend to read into the FML's WAY too much. Shut up and enjoy.
cramazing 0
YDI for putting shit on the counter
WhyworldWhy 0
well I guess you bought lunch