Miscellaneous: Today, my little sister tripped when trying to walk up the stairs...

By Laptop - 25/05/2010 04:44 - France

Today, my little sister tripped when trying to walk up the stairs with a sandwich in one hand and my laptop in the other. She choose to save her sandwich instead of my £500 laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 665

You deserved it 3 713

Miscellaneous

But there's panic on the streets of Carlisle

Our house, in the middle of our street

Age difference

By Albert06 - 14/03/2011 21:26 - France

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120 899

You deserved it 7 294

By meep - 23/12/2009 16:05 - United States

Today, I found out where my $300 worth of American Eagle and Hollister clothes had disappeared to. My 16 year old sister shredded them with scissors, took pictures of it for her Myspace and said that I deserved it for being a "conformist." All her "internet friends" said it was awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 702

You deserved it 12 308

By Discouraged - 06/01/2015 20:36 - Canada - Newmarket

Today, my brother admitted that he decides whether he will date a girl or not based on the number of likes she gets on her selfies. We share the same blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 561

You deserved it 3 496

Stay classy, bro

By Anonymous - 07/08/2020 02:02

Today, my brother got sick with a stomach bug. He didn’t even quit his game to throw up in the toilet and instead threw up straight on the carpet. It sat there for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 494

You deserved it 134

By mchhhoi - 20/07/2009 06:18 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and were I getting it on in his bedroom where he had all of his anime models on display. I accidentally knocked over one of his models and it fell on to the floor. He got angry and kicked me out. Apparently, making his models look good was more important than us making love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 558

You deserved it 13 290

By jkass - 07/10/2011 15:07 - Australia

Today, I was pulled over by the police. The cop was my ex-boyfriend. He had no legitimate reason to pull me over, so he thoroughly checked my car. He gave me a defect notice and a fine. What for? A broken door lock, on my rear passenger door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 322

You deserved it 4 469

Alarmed

By Anonymous - 22/02/2021 14:02

Today, my sister promised to wake me up at 8 for my 9:30 class. She woke me at noon, and only because I was snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 524

You deserved it 909

By homeless - 26/03/2014 23:45 - United Kingdom - Winchester

Today, I found out that, after having moved over 500 miles to begin a post-graduate degree, I'm being kicked out of the house I'm renting. We haven't yet signed agreements. Apparently I "keep the kitchen too clean". FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 386

You deserved it 3 630

By Anonymous - 22/08/2009 19:48 - United States

Today, my husband decided to drain his motorcycle oil into an empty bottle of laundry detergent. Also today, I decided to lift a stain out of my white comforter with some detergent I found in the garage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 847

You deserved it 12 357

Being a parent 101

By Shavaughn Riley - 31/10/2020 23:03 - New Zealand - Kawerau

Today, my girlfriend and I started to be intimate after a run of dry spells. I was looking forward to this, until one of our kids came barging into our room and ruined the moment for the rest of the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 235

By changeddaily - 20/03/2011 04:52 - Australia

Today, I was telling my friend how lonely I am on Skype. He responded by deleting me as a friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 399

You deserved it 11 287

By Anonymous - 27/02/2016 07:27 - Japan - Ageo

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband, and I tried to do a swift position-change like they do in the movies. I wound up flipping off the bed and busting my nose open on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 683

You deserved it 5 425

Bonjour!

By Joshua Sheldon - 19/09/2015 01:56 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, while working alone, I decided to just try some random impressions, and so I ended up doing a French accent when a customer walked in. To avoid embarrassment, I had to continue faking the accent as he struck up a long conversation with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 191

You deserved it 8 509

By Ticketshame - 08/05/2019 08:00

Today, I got pulled over for talking on my phone while driving. I'd lost my phone the day before. He didn’t believe me. So, I got a ticket for talking on a phone I can’t even find. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 083

You deserved it 134

By Anonymous - 18/04/2016 23:40 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, for the first time in a while I decided to wear a skirt. Everytime I sit down my thighs trap air and make a farting sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 192

You deserved it 2 785

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 14:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 235

You deserved it 30 107

By Noname - 03/02/2009 20:25 - United States

Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 668

You deserved it 7 765

By rent-a-cop - 05/05/2013 04:28 - Canada - Toronto

Today, as a condominium security guard, I had to enter an old lady's apartment to supervise the mandatory maintenance taking place inside. I commented on the lakeside view from her window and mentioned, "This is a pretty nice view up here isn't it?" It turns out that she's blind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 716

You deserved it 7 272

Look who's talking

By Anonymous - 10/09/2021 18:01 - Canada - Nepean

Today, my ex asked me to help her with a payment for a loan she had to pay, which she'd forgot she had to pay. I told her I needed to go to bank, and was busy at the moment. She told me that I needed to be more organized in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 147

By Anonymous - 17/11/2015 10:20 - United States - Hialeah

Today, my friend was complaining about about her new boyfriend. Playing around, I told her that he sounded a lot like my ex. He is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 618

You deserved it 2 326

By John LegoHair - 23/05/2019 00:09

Today, a little girl asked me if I was wearing a wig. It's my real hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 443

You deserved it 153

Call the waaaambulance!

By boiled ladybits - 25/06/2020 14:02

Today, I was in the shower having a little fun with the detachable shower head. I didn’t know anyone else was home until I heard a toilet flush and scalding hot water flooded my cooch. I think I need to go to the ER, but I’m too embarrassed to ask for a ride there. I can’t walk or sit properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 321

You deserved it 541

By Shower? - 19/10/2009 07:26 - France

Today, I was texting my boyfriend, making plans to see him tomorrow. He ended the conversation by saying "I'm changing my sheets tomorrow, so take a shower." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 343

You deserved it 6 362

By anon - 25/09/2014 05:48 - United States - Germantown

Today, I have learned a lot of "big" words from reading so much, but can actually only pronounce about half of them correctly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 845

You deserved it 6 782

By Leah - 24/06/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, my boss gave me a speech about my "motivation issues". I've been working for him for 2 months, the commissions I've made for him paid off his bills, so what are my motivation issues? I turned down his offer of a date. I have a boyfriend. He keeps asking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 651

You deserved it 2 617

By lug_nut - 06/01/2010 05:24 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 212

You deserved it 3 302

By Anonymous - 23/10/2010 08:03 - United States

Today, at Burger King, I had to go to the bathroom. Two ketchup packets were under the seat and exploded on my legs and pants when I sat down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 831

You deserved it 6 066

By Anonymous - 13/11/2008 02:46 - France

Today, I'm still in love with my ex boyfriend who is going out with someone else. But at least I now know that he's gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 579

You deserved it 4 345

By you fuckhobbit - 23/12/2012 22:24 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on my favourite forum when I saw a guy ranting at some pro-lifer fanatic. For fun, I replied "umad bro?" apparently moments after the forum founder also left an angry reply. I'm now banned for a month for "trolling the founder" and all my posts have vanished without a trace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 027

You deserved it 36 446

By Ren - 30/01/2009 15:50 - United States

Today, I received a text message from my older brother. It said, "Ah... I want you". I hope to god it was intended for someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 401

You deserved it 2 135

Most good songs are

By Cicie - 27/01/2017 03:06 - United States - Weatherford

Today, I discovered that one of my favourite, relatable sad songs is actually a song about gay sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 603

You deserved it 1 889

By mikey - 14/10/2010 13:05 - United States

Today, I realized that the full body wax I got two weeks ago that my wife told me would look sexy doesn't just make me look like a completely hairless ten-year-old boy. The ingrown hairs everywhere now make me look like someone with chicken pox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 139

You deserved it 7 038

By Username - 29/01/2011 05:15 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for speeding and was shocked that the cop asked me out. Before I could respond, he noticed my wedding ring, said "Nevermind" and then gave me a ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 395

You deserved it 5 460

By tandc - 01/05/2012 05:07 - United States

Today, in a rush to squeeze out of a particularly tight parking spot, I made a hurried 12-point turn. Just to make sure I had enough room behind, I hopped out of my car. It was still in reverse. I managed to wreck my own car without even sitting in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 351

You deserved it 27 868

By geekyteendisaster - 25/09/2018 07:30 - United States - Littleton

Today, my crush finally asked me to homecoming. I told my best friend, thinking she would be happy for me. Now we are in a big argument and she won't talk to me because I have a date and she doesn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 194

You deserved it 259

By iliku - 01/06/2019 02:00

Today, I was having a romantic evening with my new boyfriend, until we walked into my bedroom and discovered that my cat had ripped apart my pads and had spread them all over the place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 441

You deserved it 194

By anonymous - 05/05/2009 14:17 - United States

Today, a hot girl got into the elevator just as I took a bite out of my Three Musketeers bar. I instinctively smiled at her and chocolate drool poured out of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 350

You deserved it 59 617

By eternal - 24/06/2019 18:00

Today, while at the drive-thru at Sonic, they told me they were out of mozzarella sticks. I shed actual tears. I’m not even pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 958

You deserved it 1 166

By Anonymous - 21/01/2013 21:26 - United States - Lake Forest

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 189

You deserved it 3 799

By Popscene - 26/09/2012 09:06 - Australia - Gold Coast

Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument; however, his new-found passion for hardcore rapping meant that he tried to "diss" me using bad rhymes and ill thought-out putdowns. It was ridiculous, and didn't really make any sense, so I started giggling. He stormed off, grumbling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 302

You deserved it 2 916

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Top comments

DjeePee 24

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:22

And that's the reason why you don't let little brothers and sisters touch your stuff if nobody is watching them.

LexxyLiime 0

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Wednesday 23 March 2011 23:10

Umm, her iPod/iPhone...?

romskiies 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:06

I would too

responses 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:07

make her another one

Lozza111 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:09

hmm... sandwich or laptop, that is the question

edwinadi 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:23

pffffff me 2 xDD.

romskiies 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:36

nope just at the top of these comments XD thread jackers not welcomed tonight lol grrr dafp

jplumbob 4

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:37

depends on the type of sandwich.

romskiies 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 12:40

grrrrr I shall. zap you >;) aha zzzzzzzzaaaaaaaapppp zap zap zzzzzzzzaaaaaaaaaapppppp

degrassilovur 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 13:28

I would save the sandwich too(:...! only if it was turkey tho(:...!! with spiced honey dressinggg....!!! (:(:

haleyisawsomee 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 13:35

sounds like something I would do :)

hooah33 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 14:13

£500? what is that in real dollars?

piinkbunnii 1

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 14:18

#27 has the correct idea!! But why do posts always have to ask why, like we're having a convo together?

JoeMamas 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 15:20

Sounds like a cheap ass laptop. You're better off. Next time, buy a Mac.

RedPillSucks 31

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 15:39

500 pounds is like 1000 dollars. Doesn't sound cheap at all.

mypod66 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 15:50

I misses this one !

GabinoFlo 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 16:27

#27 pic looks like she's dead drunk. especiallly the girl all the way to the left lol drunk bi** 

ButtonEyedGypsy 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 16:47

This will forever prove that children aren't supposed to be on the Internet. And my little sister KNOWS that she isn't allowed on mine or my brothers. Draw the line, seperate your grounds.

ryguy997 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 17:06

where is freeze when you need him? he shall shoot all thread-jackers! (except me cuz I am putting a call that needs to be seen that wouldn't be seen down their.

Jessi2487 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 17:13

op maybe u should trip her down the stairs and drop her out of a 1 story window. then slam her head between the broken laptop and take her sandwich... at least thts wat ill do in that situation

cesdzd 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 19:04

only in france m/

brandy18 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 21:03

me too :)

imballinlol 0

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Tuesday 25 May 2010 23:03

YDI for letting a child use your laptop. Why not get her one of those fake Little Tikes laptops? Or maybe you need the fake one and give your sister the real one. :)