What ARE you doing?

By mountains - 19/11/2012 00:47 - United States - Pembroke

Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 036
You deserved it 1 825
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Top comments

DocBastard 38

The microwave was asking for it! Did you hear that tone it used when it beeped? It's lucky your father didn't give it the beating it deserved. Stupid ******* smug appliances.

98 3
Kinoster 20

Are you sure he was drunk? I'm always up for an argument with inanimate objects.

63 4

Comments

Kinoster 20

Are you sure he was drunk? I'm always up for an argument with inanimate objects.

63 4
shayshayshazam 14

Me: Obama is better than Romney!!! Lamp: *short circuits*

6 3
A7XCamaro 19

7 - Your lamp is obviously smart and couldn't understand how people would be stupid enough to let idiot stay in office, to a point that it couldn't take it anymore and shorted.

1 3
AGhost5445 25

Yeah I remember when my microwave didn't wave at me I got pretty mad.

13 1
shayshayshazam 14

Me: My bulb is hotter than yours! Lamp: *short circuits*

11 1
honeybadgerr 9

I always have conversations with my microwave. Whenever My food is done the screen flashes "your food is done"... I'd feel like such a bitch without thanking it

10 0
TourettesGuyFTW 25

I'm always having arguments with the tumble dryer. It's always the same problem, same issues, going round and round in circles.

7 0
sens3sfailing 24

The microwave obviously! OP's dad was getting stripped of his dignity!

12 2
Pleonasm 35

I like to think that it went a little like this: Dad: What are you lookin' at, you dumb microwave. Microwave: I was thinking that you were as fatty as that pork you made me cook today, you swine. You need to go cold-turkey on the booze. Dad: Whaddyou just say? Why I oughta... I'll give you some meat, you little shit. *Takes off pants and approaches microwave sluggisly.* Microwave: What would you have me do with that? I've cooked coctail sausages bigger than that. I know it says "microwave" but that's my method of cooking, not a suggestion of size of portion! Let's not exaggerate here, that's not even a weiner. Dad: You're in for it now! *starts punching microwave* Defrost that, bitch. Microwave: *beeping, buttons being mashed* 1:00 min. Start. You always were a minute-man. Dad: I'm sick of your half-baked insults! *Throws microwave to the floor and smashes it*

24 0
honeybadgerr 9

#32 - that was beautiful. I'm considering doing that as a monologue for theater.

5 0
Pleonasm 35

What kind of theater piece involves a microwave and a drunkard? Although it could be a cool idea for a sitcom.

4 0
honeybadgerr 9

Theater is a form of art and expression.. There are no limits.

3 0
DocBastard 38

The microwave was asking for it! Did you hear that tone it used when it beeped? It's lucky your father didn't give it the beating it deserved. Stupid ******* smug appliances.

98 3
I_Hug_Cats 26

Better go break it up before it gets violent because apparently the microwave looked at him funny.

9 1
lambda_fml 40

What the microwave didnt want to heat his meat?

20 2
Pleonasm 35

It's because the microwave is on a different wavelength.

26 4
flockz 19

or the microwave came home baked.

15 0
dancer4life143 13

I'm hoping it was the top half of him that was naked...

10 0
astralvagan 20

What was the argument about?

3 1
UncleMuscles 5

Always blowing up the tips of hot dogs.

0 0
zingline89 18

Things are getting heated

10 1