Today, my husband, who is in the Navy, had a couple of his sailor friends over to hang out. The stereotype about their swearing is true. My two year old now won't stop saying "Fuck." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son said his first word, which was, "Fuck". He got it from my great aunt, who my wife was skeptical of our son meeting because she "says too many bad words". Sorry, Honey. FML
Today, I was babysitting with my best friend, watching my one-year-old cousin. We thought it would be funny to say a bunch of swear words in front of him, since he didn't know how to talk. Five minutes later, guess what his first word was? And guess who won't be invited over for a while? FML
Today, my two year old girl said "motherfucker". Everyone laughed, even her grandparents. Our family is insane. FML
Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML
Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML
Today, my wife got a call from my son's school, telling her that he was talking inappropriately in class, using bad language. Neither my wife or I ever use foul language, spoken or written. I feel like such a failure as father and parent. FML
Today, my five year-old sister won't stop saying, "Shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML
Today, I was babysitting a young boy. I accidentally let a few words slip when I dropped something. He won't stop dropping the F bomb and his mother is coming to get him in the morning. FML
Today, my son said his first complete sentence: "Mommy likes shit." Not only will he not stop saying it, I have no idea who taught him to say it in the first place. FML
Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML
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Top comments
Youtube00 5
mommy, where the **** is my milk?
IAm1AwesomeChick 7
Did you tell them to stop swearing in front of your kid? why wouldn't you take your kid in a different room?
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Comments (139)
GodofCarnage 10
awww **** :(
raney150 0
Fire ****.
dreamering 16
Don’t worry. He/she will be much more excited years later when will learn the literal meaning of ****
ambeeelove 0
awe so cute when little kids cuss. lls
cyphi1 2
that's trashy.
MinisterOfTheDog 5
You should have taken your son to a different room, away from the pirates. Because by sailor, you mean pirate, right?
IAm1AwesomeChick 7
I said the same thing about moving rooms in the 1st comment but people seem to disagree
sonic19951 6
but everyone outside does.
iChel413 6
even if you do move to another room them you might be able to hear them still or they could move closer and talk louder. so no it isn't a very good option.
pink_raindrops 26
I'd tell them to shut the hell up, or to go somewhere else to hang out. I think it's more of the Dad's responsibility since they're his friends but clearly he was caught up in having fun with them that he didn't realize the problem.
MtnDew32 0
Expanding your child's dictionary is the first step to good parenting, I see nothing wrong.
Livinia 11
The kid's going to learn those words anyway, might as well give him a head start!
mchakkiwala 0
Selena Gomez
alex6946 10
that picture looks nothing like Selena Gomez
Livinia 11
The kid's going to learn those words anyway, might as well give him a head start!
mchakkiwala 0
Selena Gomez
coltsrock37 15
No she isn't you dummy.
BIEBERSLAYER 10
35 you're a dumbass
itsalanis 25
i kind of hoped that they wouldve waited a little longer to teach him bad words, but at age 2, oh sure i guess that could slide...
bringmepieskm 0
welcome to the navy
chillinAK 9
The soldiers I have been around will not cuss in front of me or my children, and if one slips they quickly say they are sorry. Even though I cuss a blue streak when my youngest isn't around. Sorry OP-tell your husband it's not appreciated around your child. His mates should respect his/your wishes.