Today, my husband started a new job as an OTR truck driver. He was assigned one week of home time each month, which happens to be the same exact week my period comes every month. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, when my wife is ovulating, she is wild, horny, and nearly insatiable. So of course for the last four months, our work schedules have overlapped to give us absolutely no free time together during that magical week. I just got my next few weeks of schedule… and make that five months! FML
Today, as I was training a new guy at work, my husband spent half the day creeping outside in his truck. FML
Today, I found out that my wife and two teenage daughters' periods are all one week after the other. I am living in hell almost every single day. FML
Today, I worked from home and, by coincidence, it was the day that my partner was going away for the weekend with some friends. When one of them picked her up, I noticed that the other friend's husband was going on the trip. So other husbands are invited… but not me. FML
Today, like every month, I need to summon the courage to tell my husband that I’m on my period. When he finds out, he’s gonna go out and sleep with other women until it’s gone. He has “urges” and “needs sex every day” and if I "can’t give it to him someone else will.” I’m disabled and can’t afford to leave. FML
Today, my husband has been super happy for the last 11 weeks, as he's been able to tell me what to do, when to do it and how to do it. Now I'm allowed to start work again, he's gone back to being super shitty. FML
Today, I started a new job. I also started my period, and have the shits. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted me to sleep over at his house. Then he found out that it was that time of the month for me, so he told me that he had to work this weekend and said "see you sometime next week." He doesn't have a job. FML
Today, I found out my wife and three daughters all have their period on seperate weeks. I now have no break from yelling. FML
Today, and ever since my wife has gone onto birth control pills for her endometriosis, her time of the month now lasts for three weeks each month out of the four, and on the fourth week she gets pains and doesn't feel like sex. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
wellthatsunfortunate 10
Talk to your doctor about moving your period with the help of the pill. It's possible.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Old towels, baby wipes, condoms, and spare bed sheets. Get all of them ready, and you don't have to wuss out on having period sex.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (23)
SJKatt 15
Find a group of people who get periods on different weeks and spend as much time as them as possible. It's likely that one of them will tweak your schedule. Back when I was hanging out with my best friend every day my cycle would sync up with hers.
Annesauce 5
Hang out with women who have different times. or go on the pill Take control of your sex life! <3
Annies 20
Not everyone can sync. I can’t. I’ve been living with my mom for years and we never synced. I’ve also had female roommates and I never synced with them either.
nentenkupo 19
Your period comes at the exact same week every month!?
TheSminty1 17
Oh bloody hell!
BeachMammal 8
But periods aren't based on calendar months, but usually 28 day cycles. So the affected week should gradually shift.
chessu 21
It may be a 4-week roster rather than a month in which case if your cycle is regular and indeed 28 days it would always fall on the same week out of the four so even though the dates change, the week doesn't.
skipthestorm 3
Uhhh, that's not how home time works for an OTR driver... Sincerely, an OTR driver.
Sheepiebeepie 26
One time I started running a bunch and my period was delayed a week after having increased my workout routine so vigorously.
Mark Kopiwoda 1
Have his Fleet manager change his hometime. Assigned hometime is for horrible drivers.
sherri_baby88 36
That's one red light he better learn to run.
nikkiblue13 1
Menstrual discs!!! They are worth it, even if he's not home you wont wake up in a pool of blood!
clair_brodie 35
If you take the pill you can choose when you have your period. Or if lucky, get depo or iud and not ever get a period.