Today, my husband finally got round to cutting down a tree limb in our front yard after months of me begging him. It fell on me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was trying to convince my husband to not trim the lower branches of my favorite tree. After pleading my case, I turned around and ran smack into one of said branches. My face and my dignity still hurt. FML
Today, my father was pruning the tree in our front yard. I was helping him collect the falling branches. At one point, a branch fell and I was under it. My father jumped to push me out of the way. Instead he pushed the branch into my face. FML
Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML
Today, I finally went to Home Depot to buy a chainsaw to cut down the tree leaning dangerously over my garage. When I got home, I found the tree had fallen and taken out the roof while I was shopping. FML
Today, I decided to clear up some storm damage. I carefully cut a tree that was threatening to fall on my house. It fell on my neighbor's house instead. He's taking me to court for damages. FML
Today, I was at Home Depot getting a Christmas tree with my family. While picking out a tree, a man thought it would be nice to help cut off the string that held the tree together. The branches hit me in the face and the guy managed to cut my hand. FML
Today, I watched one of my neighbor's trees fall into the electrical lines outside my house. This was after he took a chainsaw to the tree. He refuses to cover the damages. FML
Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML
Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML
Today, a tree fell on our 3-month-old family car. Today, I also learned that my husband never insured it. It's probably scrap, and we still have to pay it off for the next 5 years. FML
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Top comments
mfmylifesrsly 30
Maybe you shouldn't have been standing in the way then?...
BIEBERSLAYER 10
well even trees hate nagging.
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Comments (136)
sxe_beast 11
D-D-D-D-D-DOLT!
Deeznutzhairy 7
is the tree ok? ?
breathemein 10
is that persona mouth okay?
cbz88 0
yer that's smart...stand under the tree branch being cut down. what did you expect
kaykay9080 5
You're obviously not smart since you can't spell you're.
cbz88 0
I intended to spell 'you'. wtf are you on about. chuck your 'you're' into my sentence and see how it reads you re
jjames7543 13
61: And where exactly would this "you're" be placed in 51's comment?
jjames7543 13
Ugh 53 not 51...
EmyB_fml 8
Oh, irony
CannibalQueen15 5
did you die?
karinaprism9 4
yes
mendoza1503 0
should have been in the kitchen were it's safe
stevenmx86 8
Ydi...why were you standing under it? If you stood under it, it would have hit you, regardless of how quickly your husband "obeyed".
Bekll 31
Why wouldn't YOU do it?
shakeTHEworld 12
I misread the FML as your husband is finally cutting down the tree limb BECAUSE it fell on you. Silly me.
chonchogonzalez 2
that's what you get for leaving the kitchen.