Intimacy: Today, my husband bought me a bouquet of roses. They caused me...

By Anonymous - 20/06/2011 05:45 - United States

Today, my husband bought me a bouquet of roses. They caused me to sneeze seven times in a row. That was the closest he's ever got me to an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 935

You deserved it 8 615

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Same thing different taste

Take what you can

By omglifee - 20/12/2009 04:13 - Canada

Today, I sneezed seven times in a row. That's the closest thing I've had to an orgasm in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 930

You deserved it 4 134

A+ for effort…

By I tried - 03/10/2025 22:00

Today, I lit candles and scattered rose petals on the floor and on the furniture to surprise my girlfriend. When she came in, she sneezed uncontrollably because apparently she’s extremely allergic to these particular roses. The night ended with me driving her to the ER instead of dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 104

By sneezeattack - 14/05/2012 05:27 - United States - Aurora

Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an urge to sneeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 048

You deserved it 4 325

By torny>horny - 10/04/2011 04:42 - United States

Today, my husband tried to be romantic by throwing me in a bed laid with roses. Too bad he forgot to remove the thorns first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 624

You deserved it 4 986

That'll do it

By Zippyzoo - 03/02/2009 22:16 - United States

Today, when my boyfriend was about to orgasm, I suddenly sneezed all over his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 365

You deserved it 9 141

Best day of my life

By Cherub - 03/05/2009 22:16 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my wedding day. It was meant to be perfect. The bouquet, along with a high pollen count, set my hay fever off. I walked down the aisle in front of 200 people with streaming eyes and a runny nose; I then had a sneezing fit during my vows and blew a large snot bubble. Real attractive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 115

You deserved it 7 834

By AllergicToRosesAndSingle - 15/02/2018 01:30

Today, I surprised my girlfriend with origami roses, as I am highly allergic to real ones. Her response? To scream at me and slam the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 080

You deserved it 451

By lyinginbed - 04/06/2016 19:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking through a field with my boyfriend and he picked me some pretty flowers. I hugged him and leant in to sniff them. In doing so, I inhaled a bee up my nose and had to force it out my swollen nostril after it had stung me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 355

You deserved it 1 190

Do it again

By thornrose22 - 01/11/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 246

You deserved it 3 208

Mixed signals

By marie - 28/08/2023 16:00

Today, my boyfriend surprised me with a bouquet of flowers he'd picked himself. This would’ve been romantic, had they not all been Poison Hemlock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 678

You deserved it 118

texanengineer 4

Monday 20 June 2011 12:06

...so more roses then?

rbubbles 20

Monday 20 June 2011 12:14

you're mean, why don't you try giving him hints on what to do bed next time. the flowers were a lovely gesture though so I hope you appreciated them instead of having a sook about sneezing

Comments

daviddgaf 3

Monday 20 June 2011 15:08

Suckd To B Him!! Bahahaa

BobsUrAunty 2

Tuesday 21 June 2011 3:36

and you know how to please a woman? I bet you couldn't be half as romantic as that even if you were Michael Buble lol

BallsMcLongcock4 8

Monday 20 June 2011 15:34

Well if you never say anything it's not gonna get better, work with him on that one

born_hustla 26

Monday 20 June 2011 15:35

that's ****** up!!!

TheJester12 15

Monday 20 June 2011 15:54

maybe If your husband took a boquet of roses and ****** you with the stems it would look like you were having an ******. I mean, the screaming reaction would be real from the thorns and such :D

Sprinkle777 0

Monday 20 June 2011 18:01

this^

ohmandapants 16

Monday 20 June 2011 16:04

this aou

ohmandapants 16

Monday 20 June 2011 16:06

damn iPod. This sounds a lot like another FML I read..

haydo17 6

Monday 20 June 2011 16:16

you're terrible

aerogxt 7

Monday 20 June 2011 16:16

****** isn't everything you selfish ungrateful louse. YDI

suprmidgt 0

Monday 20 June 2011 16:41

yeah your clearly a bitch for mentioning that as though it's someones fault. you need to relax or figure out what nasty debocherous shit you into and run with it.