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I think it depends on how they broke up. If they broke up badly or with a lot of resentment, it's weird, because there might be unresolved issues. If it was an amicable break up, some degree of friendship is possible. If it was romantic incompatibility, I don't see any issue. However, it is important to say what you feel. If it bothers you, she should respect that, or you should walk away, because the problem might be your attitude towards it. Talking things out is better than posting it on FML.
you shouldn't have given her space, sometimes when girls say they need space, they really need someone to talk to, and also come out with her, tell her you dislike her communicating with her EX, if she still continues with it, break off her
Sometimes you realise that despite the great personality and moral support of a person , you can't be couples. You don't fit. But you stick around as friends.
So, why is she still your girlfriend???
I know this situation sounds bad, but maybe in context it's not actually as shifty as it seems. When I feel down, sometimes I talk to my ex. Not because he's my ex, or because I want to get back with him, but because he understands some of my mental health problems that my boyfriend just doesn't get. That doesn't make me a bad person, does it? Though OP, she should at least try to open up to you. :/
Even if it does make you feel uncomfortable, YDI because you continue to let her think its okay for her to have conversations like that with her ex.
So my thoughts on this 1- I talk to my ex all the time, we weren't good as a couple but were best friends before and even after dating. I can talk to him about so many different issues, and my relationship worries, he is a great person and always there for me, just like when you're worried about certain things concerning your significant other do you really want to bring them down by telling them?My husband has a temper, would never hit me, but does have a short fuse. Yes we have talked about it, and he works on it, but sometimes when he has one of his little fits it helps to rant to others about it. Maybe she has some same similar circumstances? Or 2- She was having doubts about the relationship, maybe she actually wonders if she should go back to her ex because she misses something about him. She talks to her ex, and realizes you are extremely better than him, and it temporarily fixes her worries and concerns. I've done that before as well.. Either way her talking to her ex when shes feeling down, isn't that big of a deal. but you should let her know how it makes you feel so you can get her side of it, without jumping to conclusions.
uhm why are you allowing it to be a common procedure? I would never let my bf do that. if he doesn't feel comfortable talking to me about what has him upset or hurting or whatever then we don't need to be together. you wanna talk to your ex then there's the door. of course my bfs exes are absolutely crazy and tried for the first 6 months of our relationship to break us up so I may be a bit bitter.
You deserve better. If she won't cut this out, leave that mess.
Keywords
She wasn't on the phone with her ex.. It was Jake from State Farm..
OP you need to sit down and talk to her about this since it's bothering you. If she can't come to you to talk about things then what's the point of a relationship? While it's great that she has someone else to talk to, I would think that it would be more of a girlfriend or someone close. Not saying that talking to an ex is a bad idea but when she's opening up it might be a little worrisome and bothersome. BTW, I like the fact that you gave her space. My husband and I had problems where he wanted to jump right in to help and I just needed time to think through things. That's very respectful and I applaud you for that. Again, just sit down and talk to her.