Today, my wife told me she wanted to try something that would turn me on immediately. While I was in our bed, she came in, wearing only the underwear she took from our 13 year-old daughter's closet. Now she doesn't understand why I'm genuinely disgusted and don't want to have sex with her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML
Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML
Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched, "What are you doing with my panties!" FML
Today, I walked into the bedroom to find my wife naked, bent over the bed, swaying her cheeks back and forth at me, so what else was I to think? Instead of some good loving, all I got was a shouting and a lecture that just because she’s naked doesn’t mean she’s after sex. I give up. FML
Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML
Today, my wife of 12 years informed me that the only sexual activity she is interested in is foreplay, and she absolutely doesn't want to go any further than that anymore. FML
Today, my wife complained that our sex life is too boring and vanilla. I have spent the last two years suggesting ideas to keep it interesting: S&M, swinging, roleplay, cosplay, public play, new toys, you name it. All I ever hear is, "Eww you pervert, that is disgusting and sick, how dare you even mention that." FML
Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML
Today, my wife was telling me about some kinky things she did with a previous boyfriend. Since my sexual adventures were fairly limited compared to hers, I commented that I would like to try that sometime. She said, "Why would we have kinky sex? We're already married." She was serious. FML
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Top comments
Justkidding100 41
ok this is just creepy though. what did she expect??
naomisjfr 2
i want you to take a step back and think about what you wrote because it is his THIRTEEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTERS underwear
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Comments (2)
Chazzster 32
OP - While I agree that this is at best weird, wife was trying something new. You should cut her some slack and put it down to trying something new. It’s best to sometimes just let the uncomfortable things slide and concentrate on the fact that she was trying something new. Maybe the next thing she tries will be more appropriate.
naomisjfr 2
i want you to take a step back and think about what you wrote because it is his THIRTEEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTERS underwear
BurnInDemonFire 39
Essentially what you've told OP here is that it's okay to be sexually aroused by someone dressed as a 13-year-old girl. Please seek help.
UniUni 20
Looks like we found the dumbass wife
Justkidding100 41
ok this is just creepy though. what did she expect??