Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. She also said I'm going to be an uncle. FML

Today, my girlfriend and I broke the news to my parents that we're having a baby. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "It's probably not yours." FML

Today, I found out via a Twitter post that my girlfriend is pregnant. FML

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML

In this economy?

Today, the good news is that my girlfriend is pregnant. The bad news is that twins run in her family. Worse, so do triplets, and I just recently lost my job. FML

Double Impact

Today, I found out that my girlfriend is pregnant. The problem is that I don't know how to tell my wife... Who is also pregnant. FML

Today, my friend told me she wanted to get pregnant. I thought that was good news, but then she said she wanted my boyfriend to be the father of her baby. FML

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML

Planned parenthood

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML

Rollercoaster

Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML