Today, my girlfriend made a delicious birthday breakfast, and she said there would be a surprise at the end. Today is not my birthday, it's her ex's. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Nice try
Today, my boyfriend treated me to a surprise romantic dinner, got me a huge balloon bouquet, a dozen roses, and a beautiful card for my birthday. Too bad it's his ex's birthday and not mine. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML
Today, my girlfriend wished me a happy birthday. Too bad my birthday isn't for 5 months. She mixed up my birthday with the guy she's been cheating on me with. FML
Happy?
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Plans
Today, my ex asked me to take the kids for the day, which was odd as it's her weekend. My son let slip that she was getting ready for a surprise birthday party, but I wasn't supposed to know. As it's my birthday in 3 days, I was touched that she'd planned something. Turns out it's a surprise party for her new boyfriend. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My ex just sent me a text. I read it, happy he had remembered. He wanted me to know he has a new girlfriend. FML
Today, I surprised my girlfriend with roses. She surprised me by getting back together with her ex. FML
Perfect
Today, I had a surprise birthday party thrown in my honor. All of my friends and family had been invited, and all of the details were perfect. Who threw the party for me? My ex-girlfriend who I dumped last week for "not being thoughtful enough." FML
Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "Happy Birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML
Top comments
Doortje 30
Eat your breakfast, get the surprise and then tell her. You get to celebrate your birthday twice this year!
Claytonic 0
I'd take it anyways
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (112)
mbe0027 5
What if the surprise is, "I'm celebrating my ex's birthday by breaking up with you and getting back with him! Hope you like sausage?" Sounds awesome and mean at once.
dpvizz 1
Like.
deannoz 0
I love how some people are telling OP what to do after this already.
perdix 31
Unless the surprise is that she's dumping you for her ex, or asked him over for a threesome, you ought to suck it up and enjoy the surprise. In a week or so, tell her your real birthday casually and get another party then.
Damaulibhai 1
tell her to go live with him if it is so.
Chella69 0
That's called a "sign".
worldclass 0
Who doesnt have facebook these days.. she obviously knew or shes a psycho bitch
CitrusGirl 0
Nothing she did was mean. I don't think she's a bitch, just confused
White_Fury 0
Win!
grandpaearthling 2
hahahahaha she can think about whatever she wants as long as you keep reaping in the surprises. just make sure the only question you pop is "are you gonna swallow or spit that out" hahaha heehee
Marvin_Android 0
How perfectly dreadful and awkward. What is there to celebrate about a birthday anyway? Every organism has one, and all it means is that you've been through the pain of existence for one more year. Life. Don't talk to me about life.