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Take the dog and move away :)

Just take it to one of her closest relatives and tell them they'll have to take care of it until she's back because you're leaving.

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As awesome in theory as that sounds, if OP stole his ex's dog he'd get into a lot of trouble. Two wrongs don't make a right.

Not stealing - taking care of it for an indefinite periode of time :)

But 3 rights make a left

No, this is the perfect chance for revenge! Give it ex-lax and let it loose in her house. If it's not her house then feed it ex-lax just before she gets home and have it shit in her car

That's fucked up. That would would punish the innocent dog as well.

#45, that is an awesome idea

Or instead of all of that, tell her you're going to charge her 150$ a day for caring for her dog. and if she doesn't pay in full, then I guess she won't be getting the dog back.

Op should take the dog on a road trip and make it very inconvenient for the ex to get it back

That could severely injure or kill the dog, you are a very sick human being and need some serious therapy.

New plan: tell the ex to send money for you to kennel the dog, or you'll drop the dog at their house and leave it. Personally I wouldn't abandon the dog, but the threat of it might force the ex to accept responsibility.

You... I like how you think

Bro, this ain't 9Gag xD

I love how you put a smiley face like you had the most clever idea in the world, and you're very pleased with yourself. What you're suggesting is theft. It's not okay; it's not justified. Stealing someone else's property (and it IS stealing) is not justified, even if that person wronged you. I'd be willing to bet a good amount of money that you are younger than eighteen years old. Your maturity level gives it away like a glowing neon sign.

says the guy ranting over the internet

#79 that's a brilliant idea

I'm sorry you thought I was serious about stealing the dog. Yes I realize it is stealing, and it was obviously not a serious suggestion. Moving away from where you live and where your life is just to steal a dog to get back at an ex, is obviously an over reaction in the biggest way. And that is why I put the smiley face; it was meant to be humorous. I apologize again that I had to spell such a simple thing out for you. There are obviously better solutions like mentioned below; leaving it with an ex's family member or a friend, or taking it to a kennel. My age and maturity have nothing to do with the comment I made, as it was plain and simple a joke, that most people understood. I will mention that you would lose your money as the age you predicted was wrong! ;)

These are the technicalities That get you in jail.

Ffs, why does everyone need to act like a political social justice warrior on fml? Just laugh at people screwing up their lives and make a couple of funny or helpful comments on it. We don't need to tell everyone in the comments how horrible you think they all are.

I don't know if it would be considered stealing. The ex gave the dog to OP. I'm sure that would even hold up in court. The ex signed nothing, so OP could say the dog was a "gift". That's the difference between lending someone miney, and giving them a "gift". >Get it in writing

Sounds like a ruff situation

Sounds like a bitchy predicament

She's barking mad

Ok that was pretty good, although near the end it got a little hairy

That was pawsitively hilarious!

What a bitch!

This is very relevant, I like it.

Just take it to one of her closest relatives and tell them they'll have to take care of it until she's back because you're leaving.

Exactly what I was thinking. A mutual friend could work too and it would offer you the chance to vent about that bitchy move.

Take it to a kennel on behalf of her and she will pay the fee when she returns. Give them mobile details etc. then leave the place before they can refuse

It depends on where OP takes the dog. I would assume that most kennels would demand up-front payment before boarding a dog or cat.

It will be ok. Keep your chin up

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It's not the dogs fault the owner is more of a bitch than it, don't take it out on it.

So the poor dog would lose the owner it loves and who loves it because they broke up. Yeah, no! Even a joke about it is horrible. I will never understand people who think that's funny.

If the owners are going to be gone for two weeks, the dog might even be killed if dropped off at the pound.

What kind of person are you? It's not the dog's fault. Too bad there aren't shelters for insensitive people like you.

you have been left with an amazing oportunity.... TRASH THE HOUSE and blame the dog. then, two days before she comes home, cut the power in the kitchen and say the breaker must have tripped

OP is at his house, not his girlfriend's

#30, he doesn't actually say who's house the dog is at. I would assume he has a key to their house and is going over there daily since most dogs freak out in new homes and that's what most pet sitters do.

@7 you are what is wrong with this country, hell, with this world.

Option 3: Sell the dog pocket the money.

That's a horrible idea. That poor dog most likely would not want to be pulled from his/her owner like that. That's also very selfish.

Again I ask, what is wrong with you people? Why would you want to punish the dog for her behavior? Animals are more than just property. You are a terrible person, & I hope I get to find out what karma has in store for you.

selling the dog might even find him a better home than with his ex. besides is only a suggestion if he doesn't want to keep it. if he does kuddos to him. and if she argues it back he can claim she abandoned the dog

How is it selfish? OP shouldn't have to pay money for something that isn't his.

Selling the doc could also leave it in a horrible situation. Not to mention we don't know the dogs temperament. My dachshund is MY dog, if she was taken from me and put someplace new I'm not sure she could handle it well. Dogs can go through depression too, when each of my grandparents died their dog refused to eat for a while and hid.

All true statements, I regret what I have posted.

Take the dog to a shelter or something and say you found him in the street, they'll take care of him and then she has to deal with the rest, but sorry for the breakup Op.

So the dog that has nothing to do with what happened between them, has to pay the consequences? Because that makes sense, right ? I hope he kept the dog till she comes back.

Or they'll kill him, because that's what happens to dogs who can't find new owners.

Call her back and tell her to find a new dog sitter then leave it at her place.