By Anonymous - 12/02/2013 18:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 244
You deserved it 3 296

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Come on, almost every guy is a genital man.

Don't forget to flush...

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Share one toilet? That takes serious skill. I suppose OP can let his girlfriend sit between his legs.

I recommend using some good air fresheners...

all i can think about is the movie bridesmades.

Or one can just use the sink like that movie haha

Yay! More quality time for you guys to spend together!

Don't forget to flush...

Flushing might not be a good idea...... Unless they want their pipes to go into overload... But then again they wouldn't want to stink up their bathroom. It's a lose-lose situation.. That... Sucks.. On a side note, there seems to be a few poop related FML's today..

"Please flush the toilet twice-once for the bulk, again for the remainder, thank you!"

Find a bucket. Or, just go spend some time in Walmart's bathroom. Sushi is delicious, but dangerous.

A bucket, tub, or watsebasket is always a good idea.

You'd think the Walmart bathroom would be scarier/worst!

Give her the bathroom be a gental man

I love when my boyfriend is a gental man. It makes me so happy.

7, you must be really lucky. I've never found a guy who is a real gental man.

Gental men are so hard to find these days.

How about a gentile man?

Come on, almost every guy is a genital man.

You know WHAT? FuCk You!

It really depends on who gets to the toilet first.

You let the girl go. There is none of this "got there first" shit.

there is when it comes to the shits. then its every man and woman for themselves.

Your username relates to this so well

Yeah then second place has to choose between the bathtub or the sink.

And then you have to clean either one you just filled with dump. Pooping in a bag seems a good option to me.

Someone has got to use the tub if needed! This is some serious shit!

Trash can? Back in my day, we found solutions to our problems. We didn't have your confounded "toy let's" as the kids today say.

Sounds like a- *gets brutally murdered with a spoon*

where you going to end it in a shi--- *gets mauled savagely by tigers*

sounds shi- *gets eaten alive by millions of tiny hamsters*

Oh my god, all of these puns are sh- *Gets teleported to an alternate universe where everyone is on fire and burns for eternity*

"alternate universe where everyone is on fire..." sounds a bit familiar...

...... Sorry I would respond, but I'm currently on fire.

*puts on flameproof, hamster-proof suit and gets in tiger-proof cage* That's definitely a shitty situation!

Your suit is not spoon-proof, genius. You got brutally murdered with a spoon.

FUCK I knew I forgot something!

It's OK, at least we have each other in FML hell.

Something fishy must be going on if you both managed to get food poisoning.

damn, I feel bad, ask to use a neighbors toilet?

I wouldn't want someone shitting on my walls.