Health: Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from... - FML

By Anonymous - 12/02/2013 18:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 303

You deserved it 3 317

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Same thing different taste

By fuuuuuh - 20/07/2012 05:47 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, my family of five and I decided to have homemade sushi. We did not prepare the fish correctly, and now we all have excruciating food poisoning. The worst part? We only have one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 792

You deserved it 30 918

By AW - 10/01/2011 12:48

Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 650

You deserved it 3 034

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 380

You deserved it 4 049

By shroooms - 28/07/2011 20:37 - Slovenia

Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 722

You deserved it 3 070

By Anonymous - 06/09/2018 14:30

Today, I and several housemates have food poisoning. From what? Last night's Subway, which we only got to avoid eating the pork that was possibly bad as none of us wanted to be sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 570

You deserved it 269

By I stink - 18/12/2018 15:30

Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 348

You deserved it 225

By takeshi - 05/08/2018 20:30

Today, I took my girlfriend to a restaurant we both like. By the end of the date, we were fighting and she angrily broke up with me. To make things worse, I got food poisoning. She didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 271

You deserved it 296

Living the dream

By notyourcleaner - 13/01/2015 11:06 - Malaysia - Puchong

Today, my new roommate puked into the sink and all over the bathroom floor, before passing out on her bed. Apparently, she was awake enough to wash her own face but not clean up her vomit. We share the bathroom. This is the second time already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 140

You deserved it 2 690

Two rooms, two atmospheres

By Anonymous - 26/11/2020 16:58

Today, I tried to cook a nice meal for my sister's friends. It turned out perfect and they enjoyed it, while I was in the bathroom throwing up for two hours due to food poisoning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 149

Cringe

By mikesok988 - 07/05/2009 07:40 - United States

Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 468

You deserved it 4 808

Next

Top comments

EnterSandman_fml 20

Wednesday 13 February 2013 0:54

Come on, almost every guy is a genital man.

SystemofaBlink41 27

Wednesday 13 February 2013 0:41

Don't forget to flush...

Comments

shorty6823 28

Wednesday 13 February 2013 1:40

Not all sushi is that bad

86ed 4

Wednesday 13 February 2013 1:44

That's why man invented the tub.

LunaTics_fml 3

Wednesday 13 February 2013 9:06

That's why? Damn I've been doing it wrong.

kyz_xox 11

Wednesday 13 February 2013 1:52

My mom doesn't like it when I have sushi with fish. Not that often, that is. I normally eat avocado rolls.

minidinosaurgoes 9

Wednesday 13 February 2013 1:52

One of you gets the toilet, the other the bathtub/shower or sink.

CaptTeemo 10

Wednesday 13 February 2013 1:52

Time for some tag team puking. Don't be too eager to get in the toilet ring though, gotta make sure your partner had their fun.

iloveshim 14

Wednesday 13 February 2013 2:09

Guess your ******** in the tub.

actingpickle09 3

Wednesday 13 February 2013 2:12

Oh God, I'm so sorry! I hope you guys feel better soon and try to utilize sinks, garbage cans, buckets, shower, and whatever else you may have.

karlcolt45 19

Wednesday 13 February 2013 2:12

double decker that shiz

APersonalProblem 13

Wednesday 13 February 2013 2:25

Ladies first

zombieslayer83 19

Wednesday 13 February 2013 2:30

I may be wrong, but I always thought food poisoning hit within a few hours?

kwyk 23

Wednesday 13 February 2013 3:06

I also may be wrong, but I think there is viral and bacterial food-poisoning (probably others also, but I think less commonly), and presumably multiple types of each so it'll take varying amounts of time to set in. I seem to remember that viral takes ~3 hours and bacterial 10-15 hours to set in(...?) but I'm probably wrong on that. For more information, see google. Terms and conditions apply.

zombieslayer83 19

Wednesday 13 February 2013 15:01

Thanks for explaining.

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