Miscellaneous: Today, my friend sent me the link to this website with a message...

By AKN - United States

Today, my friend sent me the link to this website with a message that said, "You'll feel at home." FML

I agree, your life sucks

24418

You deserved it

3109

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Miscellaneous

Proactive

Sorry…

This Charming Man

By mszoe - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33080

You deserved it

3575

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By Christopher Tobler - United States - New York

Today, I found out that my mom paints, and that I was artistically represented in a painting, as Satan, in a painting made shortly after I told her that I was an atheist. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1988

You deserved it

431

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By Face - Australia

Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15297

You deserved it

34691

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By YAABOIII - United States

Today, the 7 year old boy I was babysitting studied my upper lip and said "It's okay, my daddy won't let me shave yet either." I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks

61099

You deserved it

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By Anonymous

Our house, was a very very very nice house

Today, my house caught on fire. After it was put out, I realized the damage wasn't bad, mainly smoke damage. I went to my parents' for the night because my house smelled. While there, I received a phone call from my neighbor. Apparently, my house caught fire again. It's now a pile of ashes. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2005

You deserved it

214

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By Anonymous - Australia - Redfern

Today, during an otherwise promising job interview, I was asked how much I thought was too much for a "good hit of blow". I must have stayed speechless for too long, because the guy's next words were, "Yeah, you're not cut out for this." I'm shocked and baffled too. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43930

You deserved it

4279

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was in my car studying on the campus parking lot. It was cold outside so I had the windows up. I had a severe upset stomach and was privately drowning in my own flatulence. Moments later, my crush knocks on the window to ask me something. I had to roll the windows down. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33825

You deserved it

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By Anonymous - United States - Wichita

Today, I decided to look at the pictures my mom took during my birthday a couple of weeks ago. Every single one is of my sister. Her lighting the candles, her watching me open presents, and her eating cake. The only pictures of me are in the background. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32778

You deserved it

1950

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Don't worry dad

Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3132

You deserved it

458

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By Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I took a nap because I've been sick for the past week and I was exhausted. When I woke up, my hair, shirt, pillow, and bedsheets were soaked. I threw up all over myself in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35656

You deserved it

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By lonely - United States

Today, my dad brought me home after I was in the hospital for a week. He gets me to my room, hands me a glass of water and some granola bars, then leaves me on my own so he can go play golf. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30664

You deserved it

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By Annoyed Student - United Kingdom - Oxford

Today, my English teacher used the word "interpretate" again. This isn't the only mistake she's made though; I've been so frustrated that I've started a list of them. It's over a page long. I'm meant to be learning things from this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36912

You deserved it

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By mother of a complete idiot - 16/3/2021 21:30

Smart

Today, my daughter left a plate of food in her room for two hours. When I yelled at her about ants, her response was, "But I thought it took DAYS for ants to show up!" I raised this dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks

371

You deserved it

778

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By matou - France - Caluire

Today, I was late for work, so I grabbed my handbag, my sports bag and ran out. The bus arrived at the stop just as I did, so I hopped on and sat down, trying to catch my breath. I dumped my bags onto my knees and looked down to see my cat, staring back at me from inside my sports bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32292

You deserved it

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By JenniWearsPrada

Today, I decided to start my exercise video routine. It's an African dance workout DVD. Just as I felt confident and motivated about getting in shape, I realized that my window was wide open and my neighbors were getting a front row seat to me waving my arms in the air like an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16912

You deserved it

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By Anonymous - Germany

Today, after five long years of having been together, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to take our relationship to the "next level". We now have a Sims relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33659

You deserved it

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By segal1010 - United States - Potomac

Today, I found out that my mom has linked my iPhone with her iPad and has been secretly reading my texts. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40779

You deserved it

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By holy sleet - United States - Rochester

Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27742

You deserved it

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By cody4prez

Today, my dad told my mom to hurry up or they'd miss the start of their concert. She said "I'm coming, I'm coming..." and without thinking, I blurted "That's what she said." They're super religious, and I'm now grounded till January. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12310

You deserved it

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By Ivan

Today, at work I tried to help an old man by opening the door for him. He flipped me off because I was wearing a Kansas State University shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28421

You deserved it

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By anna - United States - Hattiesburg

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old son to the hospital. He'd gone out dressed as some My Little Pony character and encountered someone who'd had the same idea. They then got into a fistfight, and my son got the shit beaten out of him. I wish I'd never bred. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47288

You deserved it

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By Foufinator - France

Today, I ordered a chicken sandwich. I was starving and it was the fastest thing to order. Half way through it, I found something which does not belong, and removed it. It was half a cockroach, and I don't know where the other half is. FML

I agree, your life sucks

49030

You deserved it

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By fuck you, dad - United States - Bellflower

Gotcha good

Today, my family and I were celebrating my dad's birthday. The two of us were standing by the pool chatting, and I jokingly said "You're old now." I suppose I should have expected him to shove me into the pool, my phone still in hand, and retort, "You're soaked now." FML

I agree, your life sucks

35756

You deserved it

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By Anonymous - Canada - Scarborough

Today, I held hands with a male mannequin in a department store, just to remember what holding hands felt like. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28459

You deserved it

6801

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By Anonymous - United States - Valley Stream

Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

18448

You deserved it

1355

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By biggieT - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Actor's Studio

Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33871

You deserved it

7532

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By fUcKOAHdSAjl - United States - Manchester

Today, my dog was riding my car's passenger seat. He clambered over onto my lap, causing me to lose control of the wheel for a few seconds. As I tried to knock him off me, I lost track of my speed, and ended up being pulled over for reckless driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26451

You deserved it

44284

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By fail - Australia

Today, whilst singing at school in front of 300 visiting primary school children I forgot the second verse to my song and let out an F*** word with the microphone still up to my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9344

You deserved it

39462

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By Anonymous - Singapore

Today, my teacher called me into his office so he that he could pass me some information for my project. Just as he plugged in my thumbdrive, he opened the folder named "School Work". That was the folder name I used to disguise my porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26140

You deserved it

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By Sylvania - United States

Today, I was playing a medieval game with my brother, when he took all of his character's clothes off and said, "Let's have sex!" I looked at him and said, "UH YOU ARE MY BROTHER!" He turns and looks at me, smiling and says, "But not in the game!" I am a 19 year old girl. He is 12. FML

I agree, your life sucks

77556

You deserved it

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By jesus fuck

Today, I got my 1 year old daughter vaccinated. My wife tried to leave me because she's "never felt more betrayed". FML

I agree, your life sucks

3981

Phew, glad it wasn't me

484

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By Worst City in the World

Today, I traveled through a winter storm to NYC. After a miserable interview, I got in my car and drove only 200 feet before being pulled over and ticketed for momentarily picking up my GPS. Today's total: 5 points, $150, no new job, and 6 hours of driving in a Nor'easter. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3452

You deserved it

476

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By college0001 - United States - Burlington

Today, my college roommate tried to kick me out, because what I say makes her uncomfortable. We haven't talked for 3 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20755

You deserved it

1821

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By Anonymous

Today, my 6-year-old son was being charming by smiling and batting his eyelashes at me. When I asked him, "What?" he replied, "When you die, can I have your hair?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

1500

You deserved it

150

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By usmcgirl - United States

Today, I realized why my 50 year old Dad's 30 something girlfriend looked so familiar. She is in all my parents wedding photos... as the flower girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48508

You deserved it

2206

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By melissa1028 - United States

Today, I sent my fiancé a sexy picture while I was at work. I never got a response from him, so I gave him a call after a while. His 9-year-old son answered. Apparently he was getting a haircut at the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

37440

You deserved it

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By Anonymous - Canada - Concord

Today, I fell off the top of my bunk bed in my sleep onto a running fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13094

You deserved it

1551

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By nemesis5196523 - United States - Ogden

Today, I got the ending to Breaking Bad spoiled for me by a cashier while I was buying the final season box-set. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46795

You deserved it

4248

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By sallyfradoodle

New Romantics

Today, I told my boyfriend of two years that he was my first kiss. His reply? I was the first person he ever whacked off to. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1451

You deserved it

392

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By Anonymous - Netherlands

Today, a girl I met recently asked if I wanted to go jogging with her, and I excitedly agreed. A while into our run, I ran out of breath and doubled over panting, all while she kept jogging and slowly disappeared down the street. What a way to spend time together. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44370

You deserved it

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Top comments

By 2random | 0

#1046 - Tuesday 10 February 2009 12:29

I don't get it. Then again, I'm dumber than a can of freeze-dried dicks. LOL.

By alchemist5 | 0

#32741 - Sunday 15 March 2009 14:46

it was a link to THIS website. like, the one you're on now.

COMMENTS

By 2random | 0

#1046 - Tuesday 10 February 2009 12:29

I don't get it. Then again, I'm dumber than a can of freeze-dried dicks. LOL.

sicpupyz122 | 0

#926958 - Tuesday 9 March 2010 2:22

O I get it now lol

lovemysnubber | 0

#1058572 - Saturday 3 July 2010 18:07

welcome :) but hey now you have a family of losers and now you can belong... :)

bogsaget76 | 0

#3028348 - Wednesday 3 August 2011 9:57

Youuu are the bomb

cameron_natasha | 0

#3046847 - Friday 5 August 2011 20:46

I still don't get it

simpleplan239999 | 1

#4064423 - Tuesday 21 February 2012 6:49

And clearly you did feel at home because you wrote a fml

DustyStorm | 16

#5221544 - Thursday 6 December 2012 21:37

Seriously glad I'm not the only one, lol

gennyv | 29

#6016774 - Thursday 24 July 2014 0:04

The friend sent a message to this website, as in FML

By guinness_fml | 0

#8578 - Friday 27 February 2009 13:36

welcome home

By hxc_noob | 0

#9408 - Saturday 28 February 2009 20:36

this website is great, and i love seeing how bad peoples lives suck when im having a bad day (:

tman188 | 0

#2813261 - Sunday 3 July 2011 15:02

his/her friend is saying that her life sucks

By deuce_wild | 0

#28511 - Thursday 12 March 2009 19:47

i still don't get it, whats with the welcome

SkateboardGirl88 | 11

#5064808 - Sunday 21 October 2012 9:01

"This website" is referring to FML.com

DaEpicTaco | 13

#6398951 - Tuesday 1 September 2015 7:15

But I'm on the app

By alchemist5 | 0

#32741 - Sunday 15 March 2009 14:46

it was a link to THIS website. like, the one you're on now.

By fucktheworld943 | 0

#33218 - Sunday 15 March 2009 21:38

ohhhh
i thought u were sayin this website like
a random website
but ur tlkin bout fmylife.com
ohhh

XxdustxX | 2

#5254053 - Monday 17 December 2012 3:21

*throws dictionary at your face*

By deuce_wild | 0

#33600 - Monday 16 March 2009 1:31

now i get it, i was thinking the same thing

By noname333 | 0

#41918 - Thursday 19 March 2009 3:44

ya i didnt get it at first either

By Dimaranien | 1

#44711 - Friday 20 March 2009 10:20

don't we all.

By Nuahavizu | 17

#54668 - Tuesday 24 March 2009 6:23

Haha, my friend did that too.