Today, my dogs freaked out and started getting violent because they thought the sound of my vibrator was the other's growling. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having fun while home alone, until my dog heard my vibrator and tried to attack me. FML
Today, I was talking to my mother when we both heard a continuous buzzing noise. Unable to locate the source of the noise we gave up. About an hour later, my mother yells down the stairs to me. Turns out my dog stole my vibrator, chewed it and presented it to my mother. FML
Today, my girlfriend was going down on me, when I heard my dog start growling. He must have thought my girlfriend was hurting me, because out of nowhere and before I could do anything, he attacked her. FML
Today, my boyfriend's vicious dog, which he got as a security measure and growls and barks at me whenever I go near it, was caught on our security camera playing like a puppy with a burglar, while the other two burglars cleaned out all our valuables. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML
Today, I realized that the only place my missing vibrator can be is at the house of the people I just dogsat for. In their spare room. Which also serves as their kids' playroom. FML
Today, my 14-year-old son asked his dog what she was chewing on. It wasn't until he picked it up said, "Is this what I think it is?" that I realized my son was gripping my vibrator. As I took it outside, mortified, he told his sister. FML
Today, and for the past week, my dog has started barking at my door when I start masturbating. I think my mom is starting to suspect. FML
Today, I finally got the hearing aids that I've needed for years. My dog quickly learned that if he quietly sneaks up behind me and barks, it'll scare the hell out of me. It's now his favorite game. FML
Today, I decided to let in my new German Shepherd puppy inside to show the guest how adorable he is. In the middle of our conversation, he came running up to us with my vibrator in his mouth. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Enslaved 38
Or they thought it was a pussy purring?
colton_colton 50
Maybe they're trying to tell you something
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (96)
topdezfan 5
thats shady
gabygabs 8
damn girl, how loud and powerful Is that thing?... just get the real thing :P
Wowlookatthat 15
Lol time for a new vibrator
mrlopez 13
At least the dogs aren't gonna bark up the wrong woody tree.
lovelypunky 11
Haha xD
worthlessACfan 11
that's kinda cute ^~^
Awkward_Turtle69 18
Fail
j_cat187 20
Is it a vibrator with a 5cc 2-stroke attached to it?
Thunderlaxus 10
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr
iireenee 23
fyl. put your dogs in a room where they can't hear it.