get some

... tennis lessons

WINNN !

girlfriend :D

Hey it's my dick and I'll wash it as fast as I want to!

Hey, I remember you! You're that guy who got too burnt and now can't wank. Life ain't going too well for you, aye!

yum.

Today, I found out that even if somebody steals somebody else's FML, I will still have my comment removed for saying that it is stolen.FML

@TheTweaker: This is the real world. Such things require the courtesy of proof, not bitching about the negative response you got for making unfair claims against the OP.

hahaha what a loser

have this like sir

Oh my god! You are a rare 2 hand masturbator. May I have your autograph? Be sure not to break the pen when signing the paper with your strong arms.

wow lol

I wouldn't want to take that pen back after his hands have been all over it... *shudders*

Haha, that comment made my day.

is it actually rare to be a both handed masturbator? or do most guys only use their dominant hand? lol seriously.

I tend to switch hit every now and then...

I use both hands.

way to try to steal the attention 105.

someone who wacks with either hand can keep the pen...

it is, we should build a sanctuary for you guys luke the red panda. You are an endangered specimen and should be preserved to teach future generations your ways.

My girlfriend tells people I'm ambidextrous, so they ask me to write with both hands, while she stands there and laughs. They don't know why she's laughing and I don't have the guts to tell them

Well maybe it's time to start playing tennis..

YDI for being a wanker

he can't... he's got tennis elbows

Try using a tennis racket to jack off.

tried it. not a good idea

lmfaoooo

Instructions not clear enough, got my dick stuck in the toaster.

Did he give you anything for the calluses?

some lube.

sounds like you have way too much time in your HANDS.

you mean too much dick in his hands?

^ LOLLLLLL.

Haha, 69 thumbs up on this comment

How about 69 thumbs down?

You went to the doc to show off those huge forearms. I would too.

the ambidextrous man! teach me your ways, oh master of chastity!

After the comma, I actually snorted. Haha.

Well, if you decide to become a male prostitute you could make good money off of handjobs.

You mean a prostitute.

Use that free time to hit on chicks... Then you'll fall in love... Get married... Have a kid... get bitched at. no nvm dont

More like get married, get re-diagnosed with double tennis elbow. Can I get an amen?

amen

amen

praise Satan.... j. k.

awoman

lol women are not that bad

I don't know why everyone says you stop having sex after marriage. Heck knows I won't! I'll be slipping my husband Viagra at 80!!