Today, my dad finally met my girlfriend. Unfortunately, he was driving the ambulance that she was in, due to severe alcohol poisoning and was on the way to the hospital to have her stomach pumped. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my dad. He met him after my boyfriend ran his truck into a tree, and my dad had to pick us up. FML
Today, my dad showed up at my house and offered to take me to my favorite restaurant. He drove me to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. He believes I only had my daughter, who I love with all my heart, because I drunkenly hooked up with a girl. FML
Today, I went to a concert with my new boyfriend. I had a panic attack halfway through and an ambulance picked me up. My boyfriend met my parents for the first time drunk, in the emergency room. FML
Today, I had an hour-long massage, meditated for while and was finally feeling good. Then I had to call an ambulance for my idiot father who had managed to get alcohol poisoning. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, I had to pick up my dad because he was too drunk to drive home. Drive his wheelchair home, that is. FML
Today, a drunk driver totalled my new Audi. Who was the drunk driver? My dad. FML
Today, I decided to visit my dad. I haven't seen him in a while so I wanted to give him another chance to be an actual dad to me. Apparently, getting drunk and getting it on with his girlfriend while I was there was more important than spending time with his daughter, who he hasn't seen in almost a year. FML
Today, I met my fiancé's parents for the first time. The only problem was that I was highly intoxicated. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
melonrind 8
Sounds like a girl who makes good choices....Pretty sure you are getting a fun chat with Dad later O.o
dmblonde 13
First impressions always last.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (86)
cherry72 13
Time for a new girlfriend.
Jasonf6 0
Brilliant alchie girlfriend you have there.
citymayer 7
I hate the word alchie. Sounds stupid.
DocBastard 40
OP: Dad, I'd like you to meet my girlfriend. Dad: Nice to meet y... Girlfriend: BLLAAAARRRAAAGGGHHH!! OP: It's, uh, food poisoning? Dad: You're grounded.
TheDrifter 24
These days it's also reasonable to assume that any drunken failure under 35 or so might still be living at home.
hanah5 6
Haha that sucks soooo bad!
dani05 0
Sounds like she's soon to called EX girlfriend... Unless you dad is cool with that kind of stuff
dani05 0
I'm assuming they are young if she's irresponsible enough to drink to the point of having her stomach pumped.. Therefore parents play a role in if they want you to date someone and you should respect their opinion. Why would you chose a drunk over your dad? Esp when there are other people out there.
dani05 0
True but doesn't mean you have to date one. That was my point
CryMoreFMLs 15
27 - No I wouldn't.... *shifty eyes* But... Does this rag smell like chloroform to you...?
pippa08 0
If you were in the ambulance with her does that mean you got there at the last minute or... were you there the whole time!! :S
obviousboy 8
I get the feeling she's under 21. :P
phatway12 13
You really know how to pick 'em, huh?
wironandine 8
Drunken *****. Drinking is cool