His type

Today, I had my hair done for the first time in 3 years. I loved it. My boyfriend told me I look like his ex. FML

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend because he is tired of everyone giving him shit about my ginger hair. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up because we got into a fight over what color that confusing black and blue and white and gold dress was. FML

Leech

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me for telling his ex to stop taking financial advantage of him. She gets her hair and nails done, has three new pets in her house, and just bought the latest iPhone. But apparently, I'm the bad guy for suggesting that she's not really "struggling" as much as she claims to be. FML

NEXT!

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because I got a haircut without asking for his permission first. FML

Pot meet kettle

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight because I bought two new makeup palettes. He ranted that I have too much already, it all looks the same, and that I’m a hoarder. Last month he threatened to break up with me for throwing out condiments that were two years past their expiration dates. FML

Today, after months of my (now ex) boyfriend telling me he wished I was blonde with big boobs, I finally retaliated with "I wish you were a redhead with a big dick, but you don't see me complaining." He cried and said I should love him for who he is. FML

Today, my girlfriend decided to get a new haircut. Now, she hates the haircut and blames me for, in her words, "turning me into something I'm not." FML

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he, "just can't keep dating a girl with so many split ends." FML

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me, all because he thought I was a communist, a sinner, and a terrorist, simply because I think the gay rights are OK, because I agree with some feminists, and because I got blonde highlights in my hair. FML