Today, my boyfriend got irrationally pissed at me because his cat decided to sit on my lap instead of his. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend is seriously mad at me for telling his cat what he got it for Christmas. FML
Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML
Today, after about fifteen minutes of my cat bullying me into letting him get onto my lap, I finally caved. He clambered on, turned around, farted in my direction, and got off as fast as he got on. FML
Today, after struggling to fall asleep due to stress, my cat decided to wake me up by standing on me and meowing until I got up. Just for me to show him that my boyfriend had already put food in his dish. FML
Today, as I was trying to have some “self pleasure” time, my cat, WHO NEVER CUDDLES WITH ME, decides to come up and sit on my thigh. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to give his cat medicine. Unfortunately, it reacted in a way it never had before: clawed his arms to bits, bit him so hard a tooth fell out, peed everywhere, including on me, and pooped on the carpet. FML
Today, I awoke to my cat sitting on my chest. That wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't tried to get her off. She promptly went crazy and scratched me. My fiancée, who was sleeping next to me, hit me, called me cruel, and told me to apologize to the cat. I did. FML
Today, I was having a romantic evening with my new boyfriend, until we walked into my bedroom and discovered that my cat had ripped apart my pads and had spread them all over the place. FML
Today, my cat sat on me, 30 minutes before I had to go to work. When I picked him up almost immediately after he got comfortable so I could get ready, he looked and sounded absolutely crushed. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
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Top comments
Tripartita 45
Yes, keep the puns coming, folks. At this rate, we might be able to influence the Google search results of people looking for ****. Just think of how confused and disappointed they'll be.
Calingaladha 21
He's just feline sorry for himself...
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Comments (49)
chosha_fml 27
Sort it out now with the cat. Because potentially having kids with that kind of jealousy would be a recipe for disaster.
Joseph24689 14
What a Cat-astrophe No..?? Oh
moodyreallyrocks 27
He should be happy, because his car likes you, not sad and pick a fight..
Lalala579121 28
I would actually be quite scared if my car started liking someone, even me.
Zeroies 12
guess he dozen't like pussy on pussy action. signed by - retarded ****
sageholter 8
what a CATastrophe
KingSquisher 13
Sit closer together and it might matter less. Maybe explain to the cat that its human is kinda nuts and would prefer the cat sits on his lap. Your cat speaks English, no?
jerbear91 18
Sadly I had an ex who got jealous of me greeting the cat before him when I got home from work.
Mysterybounty 6
Run...just run.
JubileeBee 31
to be fair, i always get salty when my cat gives other people more attention than me
jtsmommy 11
When first dating my now ex-husband, he used to make a rule and tell me that whomever the dog say with last had to clean up his next poop. It was a good deterrent for getting his dog to like me more, lol