Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML
Today, after asking my boyfriend multiple times to be more kind and romantic, he looked at me lovingly and said, "You know, you look pretty sometimes." FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend, feeling pretty low. I said something along the lines of, "You like me even when I look like shit." He replied, "Ah, that's just how you naturally look." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said, "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I'm the best lay of his life. I really wish I could say the same about him. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me the reason he can't keep an erection while we have sex is that I'm not attractive enough. FML
Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that the main reason he was dating me was because he was intimidated by pretty girls. FML
Today, while out with my boyfriend, I gave a beggar some cash, who then smiled at me and said to my boyfriend, "You have a beautiful little lady, take good care of her." Flattered, I hoped my boyfriend would agree with the compliment. He turned and said, "Hear that? He said you were little." FML
Today, my boyfriend compared me to an unattractive actress. When I said it was sort of messed up to say that to me since she's not pretty, he said, "She's not as bad as you." FML
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Top comments
Psychicgirl17 18
What a dick. Dump his ass
SWhimsynBubbaS 14
You mean your ex-boyfriend?
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Comments (129)
pinguino3669_fml 23
Well now's a good time to end your relationship before he starts to get more pushy
CrystalFelix 13
Wow.. can someone say jerk? I seriously hope you threw that, "disgrace to the male population" to the curb and out of your life! You deserve better.
tehdarkness 21
People always stay in relationships that they shouldn't. Hope that you have enough balls to move on! Being single is awesome and eventually you will meet someone that doesn't insult you.
xkbz510 13
Dump him. I hate guys like him. Despite a lot of people would say the same. You deserve better. Good Luck Op.
jer_36 10
And you're with him why? I have a hard time feeling sorry for someone who can easily do something about their situation. It will take all of 10 seconds to dump him and then you can find a new guy who treats you better.
LissaMccracken 23
Oh shut up
jer_36 10
Shut up for what? Giving good advice?
luckysilverbell 5
Your boyfriend has clearly never heard of rohypnol.
thegreycat_fml 12
Dude, rape jokes? Not funny.
obsquire 5
I hope he's your ex boyfriend now
Ziggy122 15
Wow. Either he was joking, or he's a complete and total scumbag who doesn't deserve a girlfriend.
feelingold 18
& you're pretty
Ray_of_midnight 22
I really really hope that was his idea of a bad joke. Otherwise, he's a tool, and DTMFA.