Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he could predict my periods because he keeps track of when I'm at my bitchiest each month. This wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't so accurate. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend after a fight. I told him the reason I was so irritable is because I'm on my period. He yelped in disgust and nearly fell out of bed. Good to know I'm dating a man-child. FML
Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I told him, he impatiently said, "Is it over yet?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything. I replied, "Guess." He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently, I've been bitchy. FML
Today, my boyfriend is threatening to dump me if I don’t give him all the details of my menstruation so he can track my periods with an app on his phone. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Today, my boyfriend caught me in a lie about being on my period. He memorized my menstrual cycle, but still forgot that today is my birthday. FML
Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML
Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as "the bitch." FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
And he could be the Amazing Single Asshole. His superpower is making stupid statements and getting dumped SUPER fast!
NoFeet 4
Tell him he can be Super Undersized Penis Man
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Comments (119)
Fusion55 7
Haha that's a good one.
coolguy53111 5
Guess you Can only be a hero 5-7 days of the month
girlymae 12
Ohh... Ouch!
megeegan 3
Haha yes! Costume wise I would say you need a dark red cape, with bright red spandex suiting and a bloody tampon in a blue diamond on the chest. And a midol ad on the cape.
88vivera 9
If he meant that dump him
andrew6p 19
Noorfml, ur one of my favorite commenters on fml
TehParteh 9
I feel like a lot of fmls are people who joke around and someone takes it to heart.
Stoopid_life 2
And you could scare away the villains with your PMS.
DinoDropns 1
Bahahaha!!!! Funny as hell!!!!
PetPetAngel 2
That's when you say, "I'm the Period because I end things, like this relationship."
infinitron 7
I may have broken my ribs laughing at that.