Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he could predict my periods because he keeps track of when I'm at my bitchiest each month. This wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't so accurate. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend after a fight. I told him the reason I was so irritable is because I'm on my period. He yelped in disgust and nearly fell out of bed. Good to know I'm dating a man-child. FML
Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I told him, he impatiently said, "Is it over yet?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything. I replied, "Guess." He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently, I've been bitchy. FML
Today, my boyfriend is threatening to dump me if I don’t give him all the details of my menstruation so he can track my periods with an app on his phone. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Today, my boyfriend caught me in a lie about being on my period. He memorized my menstrual cycle, but still forgot that today is my birthday. FML
Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML
Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as "the bitch." FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
And he could be the Amazing Single Asshole. His superpower is making stupid statements and getting dumped SUPER fast!
NoFeet 4
Tell him he can be Super Undersized Penis Man
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Comments (119)
bassplayr92 4
Sounds more like a villain...
SamanthaCassieL 10
Most girls get moody from Pms. But if it's irritating him in a way where he thinks your a huge bitch, maybe you are, OR maybe you should find someone who is more tolerable to your moodiness. My ex thought I was a bitch, but my current is like "well, you're moody, but I can handle it." and deals.
SamanthaCassieL 10
Plus, I don't understand how being a huge bitch is a superpower. If it was, all of us women would be superheroes at some point.
rammy125 4
Can't blame him for being honest
AznSamoan52 10
There is a line between being honest and just being plain rude. I am pretty sure Op's boyfriend crossed the the line to be a asshole.
agtxero 2
You got to give him credit, that was a witty line
eggmarie 25
No it wasn't...?
brokenboy124 4
It was a funny line, but for all the people saying to dump him and whatnot: My wife and I make jokes like this to each other all the time. It depends on your relationship if these comments get laughed at or if they can destroy everything. If I made the same comment to some of my exs, then fighting would have begin. My wife would have laughed at me and called me a jerk, then moved on with her life.
Factor_fml 6
f your wife's life for having to laugh off your insults.
brokenboy124 4
She gives them as good as she gets. We both tease one another. We are secure enough in our relationship to have fun with one another. It may not be the same dynamic as everyone else's relationship, but it works for us. There is no need to judge me based on the fact my wife and I have fun together.
andr3warbini 7
Thats him being on his period.
scuttlebuttz 1
Well maybe if you weren't such a bitch.... (I kid of course)
outoftown 27
#46, Aha, the famous, "I'm kidding" excuse. It doesn't work. It just makes you sound like an ass who can't stand by his own insults.
purpledrizzle 5
Wow, your boyfriend is the greatest superhero of all! The Hand! He doesn't need lovin' from you when that hand is working out great for him ;)
TheGreasyHobo 2
Insta-dump! Super effective!
kjklopu 1
I wanna vote for ur life sux but its at 369