Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML
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By
clairedycat124
| 3
You must have been pretty pissed
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Just_STFU_Please
| 13
That escalated quickly
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PleaseStayChill
| 9
She should be glad it was only pee... Just saying...
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thefella
| 10
4 - just stfu please
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walmartpaysme
| 15
Unless he had gutted his wife and was throwing her innards off the balcony, I don't really think this could be much worse, seeing as it would have been difficult to take a shit off the side of a balcony.
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Feared
| 9
Sounds like urine trouble.
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Epikouros
| 31
It could me much worse if pigs could fly.
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YacL
| 15
1 & 32 - You guys are so punny.
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jacquesromualdez
| 12
Surprise golden shower. :)
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PleaseStayChill
| 9
31- I've personally seen someone take a dump from a balcony. Not a pretty sight, but very possible.
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IAmJad
| 18
I pee what you did there.
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LolFMLnot
| 10
Why does he pee there? Whats wrong with washrooms? o.O
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DarthSekra
| 4
You see us Men like to pee out in nature it helps us feel more one with earth and helps us feel the animal that is deep within all of us.
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_krystallynn_
| 11
lol it took me a minute to figure this out:) punny lol
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Hannahbanana95
| 8
I would be!!
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tjv3
| 10
YDI for sneaking around
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iOceanus
| 18
31 - That is pretty extreme, but morbidly funny. Should I be worried that I found it funny?
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missymay993
| 11
Pissed off AND pissed on!
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clairedycat124
| 3
That's just plain disgusting.... Good luck grinding a girlfriend
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claiiire_fml
| 17
Just stop.
There's only so many puns you can make involving pee, and that wasn't one.
There's only so many puns you can make involving pee, and that wasn't one.
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claiiire_fml
| 17
It's a pretty simple thing to figure out, 77.
Wow...
Wow...
By
ManInTheMachine
| 19
Ah, the joys of sneaking out.
A shame you're not into Golden Showers OP.
You would've gotten two things out of seeing your boyfriend that day.;)
Oh, and chances are your boyfriend's dad DEFINITELY knew you were out there.
A shame you're not into Golden Showers OP.
You would've gotten two things out of seeing your boyfriend that day.;)
Oh, and chances are your boyfriend's dad DEFINITELY knew you were out there.
Reply
kyleekay
| 25
That's definitely an innovative approach to telling your son's girlfriend that you hate her.
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Soloman212
| 28
Innovative?! Inventive!
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kyleekay
| 25
75- Please go Google "synonyms for innovative".
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AKGirlinSD
| 20
Plus, now she can check off Golden Showers on her "Sexual Things I'd Like to Try Someday" list. Kidding!...kind of lol.
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anonymous100000
| 17
much deserved. OP must be young for needed to "sneak" to makeout with the bf.
By
paperroll880
| 16
That's disgusting!
Take an umbrella next time?
Take an umbrella next time?
Reply
MormonPornstar
| 7
Really? Who the hell prepares in advance to be pissed on?
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s0m3guy2010
| 21
15- Anyone who visits R. Kelly.
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MormonPornstar
| 7
So, I would like an Emergency Preparedness kit for my future adventures... Got the Piss Umbrella, anything else?
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Feared
| 9
Yeah, don't forget your poop riot shield.
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MormonPornstar
| 7
Anything I need in case of projectile menstruation?
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SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
Padded armor and tampon swords.
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MormonPornstar
| 7
Locked and Loaded
By
mintcar
| 9
Still trying to figure out why he'd rather pee outside than use the bathroom.
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mizuki123
| 8
I know people who would walk outside and pee then go to the bathroom. Guess it saves water?
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evilplatypus
| 38
5 - The sense of "freedom," maybe? Some people do things JUST because they go against societal norms. Especially if they live a very structured, controlled life.
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RedPillSucks
| 31
The realization that you'll probably interrupt your son in the middle of coitus with the flavor of the day.
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justhanging
| 6
Well, there's the obvious reason ... he saw that she was down there.
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ranroy
| 2
#5 its just easier that way
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brt3420
| 13
I grew up on a farm and not having bathrooms readily available in the field while I worked it was normal to take a piss off the side of the tractor. Growing up like that made public urination a norm, I live in town now and it still didn't change anything. If I'm already outside why walk inside to take a leak?
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jjohnson26559
| 1
I like the freedom of being able to wave my wiggly around whilst I pee. Being constricted to a toilet does not allow me to do that and not get nagged.
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bladedrose
| 3
It just feels better to pee outside then inside ^.^
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evilplatypus
| 38
52 & 60 - Just so you two know, if you live in the United States and someone sees you doing that and complains, you can get put on the National Sex Offender Registry since it's considered indecent exposure.
A friend of mine peed outside on private property, but since he was visible from a public area he still got registered.
A friend of mine peed outside on private property, but since he was visible from a public area he still got registered.
Reply
Jaxx66
| 21
84- to add to that, if you get a BJ from your wife/girlfriend in the car or with a curtain ajar in your house you will get put on the list. 'crime against nature'. And if you show tits at Mardi Gras, you'll get put on the list.
So continue to pee outside, everyone will be a RSO one day if this continues.
So continue to pee outside, everyone will be a RSO one day if this continues.
Reply
twinkiefeets
| 17
What list?!
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untamable_mare
| 4
Because men are nasty, that's why. Same reason they Piss in bottles instead of going in to the rest area or truck stop. Men are pigs.
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claiiire_fml
| 17
43- So he pissed on her? That's a bit... extreme.
By
mizuki123
| 8
Don't deny it OP, you know you liked it. That would suck though.
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skittlestrailmix
| 14
No way dude that's gross
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kdog333
| 1
im guessing most people dont like to get peed on by their boyfriends father, but you know, just a thought.
By
betseyville
| 6
If his name is Robert Kelly, he did it on purpose.
By
123man
| 11
At least urine is sterile. Be glad he didn't poop off the deck.
Reply
s810s_waitin
| 1
Then it would be a poop deck. Huh? Huh?
No. Alright I'll stop.
No. Alright I'll stop.
By
BigRedDilDoTIME
| 1
LOOL
By
syki
| 22
How is this any different from a normal night with your boyfriend?
By
Ozuru
| 11
(insert overused golden shower comment here)
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BellaBelle_fml
| 23
Well played.
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off_constantly
| 8
insert my shlong into your mouth as punishment for using an overused "insert" comment
A shame you're not into Golden Showers OP.
You would've gotten two things out of seeing your boyfriend that day.;)
Oh, and chances are your boyfriend's dad DEFINITELY knew you were out there.