Today, my boyfriend and I started our diet. After a long day of being held accountable for every calorie I ate, I went home to sneak a snack. My boyfriend came over to surprise me, and found me on the couch shoveling left-over Indian food into my mouth. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I decided to start a new and healthy diet. When I came home from my run this morning, my family decided to show their support by buying takeaway food. FML
Today, I was eating lunch with my boyfriend when I started choking. My boyfriend took it as an opportunity to sneak food off my plate. FML
Today, I made a healthy, delicious dinner. My girlfriend picked at it until it went cold, then stuck it in the fridge. Later, she devoured a giant bowl of sugary cereal, then complained all night that her stomach hurt. This happens a lot. FML
Today, my fiancé and I had a fight because he wouldn't let me get what I wanted to eat, even though it was my money. He said, "It's way too many calories. I'm supposed to help you lose weight." When I pointed out that I had given up a month ago, he looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can tell." FML
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Today, I told my parents that I was going on a diet to lose weight and I wanted their support. They brought home donuts and pizza for dinner. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. His partly digested nachos decided to make an appearance halfway through. FML
Today, my boyfriend fed me chocolate chip cookies with laxatives in them because he was concerned I did not poop enough. FML
Today, is the fourth day of my husband's and my new diet and exercise routine. I've already caught him eating junk food 4 times. He has lost 2 lbs and I've gained 3. FML
Today, I found out that my husband thinks I'm fat when I caught him slipping diet pills into my morning smoothie. FML
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Top comments
Feverrotes 15
OP it's because of people like you that United States of America is considered the land of the obese. Giving up on a diet after the first week or so is slightly acceptable, but on the first day? Some people need to come to their senses and realize that posting about their weak commitments/determinations on FML is not the best way to resolve the issue or gain sympathy.
shlee053 2
it's called will power loll
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Comments (151)
blastvortex 4
♪ Somebody got caught with their hand in the cookie jar! ♪ ♪ You've been a naaaaaaaughty lady! ♪ LOL, #103
jaybloby 0
fat bottomed girls you make the rockin world go round!!!!!
drumhellermd 0
if you're gonna cheat on a diet, can't you find anything better than Indian food???? BLECCCHHHHHHH
kelleyb323 0
whoop-dee-doo. stop being so dependent on what your boyfriend thinks and eat what you want. you know this country's values have gone to shit when a girl has to sneak food for fear of what her boyfriend will think. I'm sure he was hungry too and you could have just told him I'm sure he would have understood and even ate with you.
xoconnie 8
EWWWWWWWWWW INDIAN FOOD? no offense, but that shit smells
Boddmon 0
You smell.
ayjayyuk 0
be grateful he didnt start throwing buckets of water at you before calling greenpeace chubby little loser - nothing but a joke
mxmaniac9 0
fat people always wanna lose wieght and when they do this the wonder why they didn't...no self disiplin
PhillyFox 0
Depriving yourself of a food you love is the worst thing you can do when you're dieting. They key is to eat small amounts of it ever now and again (ie one small piece of chocolate per day) while eating healthy things the rest of the time. Otherwise you'll crave it all the time and end up binging.
tacoman007 2
Not eating food doesn't make you lose weight, eating a balance of foods makes you lose weight. When you don't eat food your body stores up fat for energy, and if you should start eating normally again, you inflate like a balloon.
rramirez1 0
he didn't come over to surprise you, he came over ti check in his fatty girlfiend who can't control herself!