Today, my boss stopped mid-walk during a conversation about the humidity in our office, after I told him I didn't like the air conditioner on, because I'd rather not be cold and wet, and that I liked it warm and sticky. I knew then he was no longer thinking about the AC. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, my skinny co-worker complained that sitting just underneath the AC vent was making her too cold. My boss had us switch places, because "your mass keeps you warm anyway". FML
Today, the company I work for decided to "go green" and stopped using the air conditioner to cool down the office. It is currently 81 degrees at my desk. FML
America, fix your bathroom stalls
Today, my boss overheard me in a bathroom stall talking about how much I hate my job and couldn’t stand him. He didn’t say a word, I hadn't even heard him come in, I just noticed him staring silently at me through the crack in the stall, before leaving. FML
Controlling
Today, I accidentally hit "Reply All" on an email complaining about the office thermostat being too cold. My boss replied, "It’s cold because I control it." FML
Today, I was in the break room with my colleagues and our awful boss. As ever, he was talking trash, convinced that his jokes were actually funny. The window was open, and it was chilly. As he walked by it, I mangled my words and said, "Cedric, could you please shut your mouth?" FML
Today, my boss confirmed he is a micro-managing asshole. We walked into the office together and I turned on the lights. He switched them off and switched them on again, just to make sure that I did it right. FML
Timing
Today, my boss stopped me mid-sentence, scowling and telling me to zip up my fly. It wouldn't have been so embarrassing if I hadn't been in the middle of giving a presentation to not only him, but his own boss and a company executive as well. FML
Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on it all day. When I got up, my pants were damp. FML
Working conditions
Today, I'm sitting in a disgustingly hot office with all the windows thrown open. There is no fan, and the owner won't let us use the air conditioner. The smell of mold permeates the room from the ceiling, giving me headaches by the end of the day. The owner refuses to get someone in to clean it. I can't quit. FML
Today, while on lunch break, my fat, old co-worker walked into the break-room. I managed to block out his perverted heavy breathing, but had to leave when he began emitting a terrible odor that smelled like cheesy, sweaty molding feet. I barely held onto my lunch. FML
Top comments
yamatelle 19
Are you the same girl who went to Subway and said you couldn't handle 12 inches?
italianbby 11
Perv
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Comments (223)
MCVelvet1497 3
I smell a promotion.
bawlerr75 9
Mabe it's just that FiSHY Speed stick......? -__-
TobyFunke 3
yeah, FML! Today I spoke to my boss using extra sexual terms anyone could pick out, the end its actually F your boss' life because you lead him on and then didn't finish him off
whiterabbit420 4
What I'm wondering is who actually likes being sticky? Blech!
V19Spartan 1
I do #giggity
EmyB_fml 8
Ew gross, perv boss !
100thninja 5
Were you the lady that said you couldn't handle the footlongs?
100thninja 5
******* GOD YOU NINJA'D ME
Munchkin13 6
Maybe you should start thinking about what your going to say before you actually say it...
bawlerr75 9
A raise?..... I think yess!!!
nevergo 10
If he gives her a raise she'll give hime one
bawlerr75 9
Ahah unless his hot n sticky n SMELLy xp
lorenzoman77 7
PROMOTION!!!
AshorinaMoshe 10
haha, awwkwaarddd :|