Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML
Today, my daughter lost a tooth. I wanted to make the Tooth Fairy experience extra special, so I dipped her doll's feet in paint to leave “tracks” from the window to her bed. As I was adding the finishing touches and spreading glitter, I tripped on a toy, faceplanted and lost my own tooth. FML
Today, I caught my young daughter eating candy after brushing her teeth. Angry, I asked her if she wanted all her teeth to fall out. She smiled and said, “Yes!” FML
Today, my 5 year old swallowed her loose tooth, which she was going put under her pillow for the toothfairy. My wife then told her 'what goes in must come out'. And now everytime she does number 2, she makes me dig for her lost tooth. FML
Today, I was woken up by my 5 year-old daughter hitting me with a pillow because she had a dream that I was using her toothbrush on the dog. We don't have a dog. She is now refusing to brush her teeth. FML
Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML
Today, I woke up to find my 6-year-old daughter had duct taped me to my bed and dropped my wallet down the toilet. Well played. FML
Today, I had mice in the house and had to kill them with mousetraps. I pulled a trap out with a dead mouse and my four year-old son saw. Mice are his favorite animals, and now he won’t speak to me. FML
Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML
Today, my daughter, who can pick up spiders and even snakes without flinching, screamed at the top of her lungs because she saw a mouse. Um, what? FML
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Top comments
olliec 0
Smart kid. haha
Soup_fml 0
Now I have this image in my head of a little girl waking up to find a decapitated fairy under her pillow.
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Comments (170)
bosshaug 0
Best fml in months
Amkii 0
How the **** did a 6 year-old girl learn how to set a mouse trap?! And if they weren't live, this isn't a FML... other than the fact your kid wants to kill an innocent fairy and may develop odd tendencies later in life...
perdix 31
PWND by a six-year-old! You need to get that kid to be a co-host of "Mythbusters." I don't know if Adam and Jamie spend sufficient time debunking the crap that we ramrod down our kids' throats. Either come clean about Santa Claus or expect to find razor wire and plastic explosives in your chimney on Dec. 24.
BlueberryPies 0
You kind of deserve it for lying to your child. I never understood how parents spend years trying to instill in their children that lying is bad & honesty is good, but continue to lie to their children about Santa Clause & Tooth Fairy & the Easter Bunny. Actions speak louder than words, especially when it comes to parenting: you can preach about the importance of honesty all you want, but your children will pay more attention to the lies they catch you telling.
OLOtheDemigodess 0
*rolls eyes* I'm GLAD my parents 'lied' to me. A beautiful part of my childhood would have been an empty hole otherwise.
saviisneat 0
#19 you obviously were a very unhappy and unimaginative child. I'm so sorry you didn't have fun when you were growing up :( How sad. Here is the dumbass award for the day.
xirocreator 0
This was on MLIA a couple of months ago. So you really do deserve it, for being a liar in more ways than one.
chakrabs 0
FAAKE. No way a mouse trap can stay under a pillow without being activated. Besides, by a six year old? They'd break their little fingers trying to set the thing.
Jenmaree 9
Yeah, but it still made me laugh
Sakke 4
Clever girl.
somename1223132 5
Best kid ever
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
First off, the OP never stated that the mousetraps were "live" or "set", so there may have been no danger at all. Secondly, why is the parent trying to take the tooth at all? THAT'S THE TOOTH FAIRY'S JOB!!!
Stunt_fml 5
Well said captain. My sentiments exactly.
claritin 0
If the traps weren't set, then what the hell would the FML be?
BoW2Me 0
****...as soon as I read this FML I immediately thought about posting the same comment, but as usual, someone beat me to it. FML.
GreenDaysGeekGrl 0
Whaaat? If there were mouse traps under the pillow the trap would have gone off when the girl laid on it... right?