By shoelace18 - 06/09/2009 04:19 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old swallowed her loose tooth, which she was going put under her pillow for the toothfairy. My wife then told her 'what goes in must come out'. And now everytime she does number 2, she makes me dig for her lost tooth. FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 813
You deserved it 5 931

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she's 5 and your how old? how can she make you do anything? get a grip.

I don't know what to think, here. Either that's love, or that's just demeaning. This could be the first time she learns about loss, if you stop right now.

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I don't know what to think, here. Either that's love, or that's just demeaning. This could be the first time she learns about loss, if you stop right now.

#44, you need to learn to read. The daughter is doing the digging for her teeth, not the mother. Though that's pretty bad advice on the mother's part

your retarded, its the father who's digging for his daughters tooth, hence the sentence " my wife" unless it's a bisexual marriage in which case, the daughter would be adopted.

tell the kid that the tooth fairy knows where all the teeth in the world comes from so she should expect her cash in a few days and FYL for digging through poo

I posted earlier but my message disappeared. #44, learn to read. It's the daughter, not the mother, that's doing the digging. Though the mother *is* to blame for saying that, kids take everything literally.

No, the daughter is the one who's making the original poster (the father) "dig" for it. The father is doing the digging, not the daughter.

yea i think now wud be a good time for the kid to learn to truth bout the tooth fairy

Or just don't? The tooth fairy was going to take it anyway. Just leave the money under her pillow anyways, freak.

She makes you...

dude... you'll be doing that forever... If it doesn't come out in 3 days, it ain't coming out... and it should actually have dissolved in her stomach, besides you should tell your wife to find it, she suggested the idea.

#45 you are wrong. #44 was more right the dad is digging not the daughter. Also it is unclear as to who is making him dig it just says she.

#45 and #62 when you correct someone try to make sure you are right. Learn how to read.

hello people he said "now everytime SHE does number 2, SHE makes me dig for HER tooth" meaning the daughter is making him do it honestly fuck that little girl, ur letting the women in ur life to u into the HouseBitch as a housebitch u must fulfill such duties as kissing feet, smelling shit, and of course digging in it I'd tell that lil girl "here's a dollar, take it or dig thru ur own shit, the choice is yours!"

@133, you make women sound horrible. were not bad. u dont hear anyone calling men sexy. and we r smarter than men the chromosones: women xx men xy p.s. x=smart!

@133, you make women sound horrible. were not bad. u dont hear anyone calling men sexy. and we r smarter than men the chromosones: women xx men xy p.s. x=smart!

In the most difficult scientific project of all time, The Manhatten Project, there was not a single female scientist working on the project. The only females in the facility operated the cafeteria and were receptionists at the door for the important federal officials, also most likely male. You cannot say either way whether a certain gender is more inteligent than the other because there are plenty of retards and geniuses in both.

she's 5 and your how old? how can she make you do anything? get a grip.

you obviously don't have children #2

I have a kid, and I agree with graveworm. If she can "make you" dig through her shit at age 5, she'll make you buy her weed at age 10 and then make you get the fuck out of the house when groups of hobos come visit her at age 12. I hope you said 'no' or you'll be dealing with a pothead hobo slut!

The way I took it was the WIFE made him do it, not the kid. That's just my interpretation though.

It's confusing because there are two "she's" the last sentence and it would seem strange if they refer to two different antecedents. My first instinct was that the wife was making the demands and my comment would have been completely different. I still think the tyrant brat child is funnier than the henpecked, pussy-whipped husband.

Haha, I definitely agree the tyrant 5 year old is a lot funnier. =) I do understand how most people seem to think the kid is making him do it, but I'm used to reading things (essays, etc) for friends with bad grammar, so thats why I first thought the OP was referring to the daughter as the first "she" and the wife as the second.

i thought it was the kid as well. i was going to suggest that the OP just stick some money under her pillow to make her shut up. actually, i think it is the kid, because it says every time "she" makes a number two

#46, learn to read. The daughter makes the father dig for it. So basically you're all wrong. And OP, just say no, perhaps? Teach your child that shit is not the nicest substance to sift through? And point out that the tooth will already be gone?

Charlesdefreude, Don't be so harsh and dogmatic. That last sentence is ambiguous. The mention of the wife in the previous sentence muddies the waters. I chose the interpretation where the kid made the demands. Mostly because it was funnier.

I think it was indeed the kid, if it was his wife I doubt the OP would have married her...

How insecure with your masculinity do you have to be to tell another grown-ass man to grow some balls around his five-year-old CHILD? Get a grip.

I hate it when somebody says "learn to read" and they didn't even read the person's comment correctly, and they go on "correcting" the person by saying the exact same thing.

Plexico, the reason I said "you obviously don't have children #2" was because when I read the OPs statement "she makes me dig for her lost tooth." I thought of it as the child lost her tooth and wanted him to dig for it, so as some father's probably would - he did, without being forced into it. Sort of like when my mom says "clean your room" and I do, if I was talking about it, I'd say she made me. I suppose the OP could have said no and either the child or wife made him - that just wasn't my initial thought.

Looks like the poo fairy got it instead....

Yeah, really. Have the 5-yr-old write a note to the Poo Fairy on toilet paper, explaining the mixup. The Poo Fairy will get the tooth to the Tooth Fairy when it comes through.

LOL. That's such a brilliant idea. Now that's how you parent, people.

You should make your wife do it for instigating this

Omg, your the tooth fairy, just give her some money. That is plain gross.

Just tell her that the tooth fairy will bring her the money anyway... that's disgusting.

Why need she learn about loss? Just tell her that the tooth fairy will bring her money despite her swallowing her tooth.

dude... teach her that things also digest. Teeth digest as well, right? I wouldn't know. Haven't swallowed a tooth before.

Nope - teeth come out whole, trust me on this. ... mercifully my son was 6 and quite capable of rummaging through his own poop to find the tooth. Let's just say the tooth fairy didn't save this tooth like she normally does, this one went in the bin! There needs to be a sub-clause about the tooth fairy being in league with the mermaids and that kids will still get cash bribes even if their teeth end up flushed out to sea!

Shouldn't it be pretty much destroyed from the stomach acids? therefor, not looking like a tooth?

It was white(ish) and tooth(ish) shaped, I chose not to examine it too closely. Trust me when I tell you that if your child brings you something from his/her poop and proclaims it to be the lost tooth you WILL believe them, you WILL give them a ziplock bag to put it in and you WILL don your very best fairy wings and hand over cash!

Haha man your a good parent, i couldnt do that. Just let her know that shes still going to get cash in case you dont find it lol man this made me laugh

Lol! That happened to me when I was younger, but I didn't look through my poop to find it, I wrote a letter to the tooth fairy instead, telling her what happened. I got the money anyway (: